口语 Ideal Career
巡山小妖精
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2020年07月30日 17:04
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ily. I. Mattu, Sasha K. II. Hornby, Kirstin R. III. Title. IV. Series HD4904.25M55 2004 650.1—dc22 2003062417 To Shirley Elizabeth Mills who asked that this book be written. This page intentionally left blank Contents Introduction: Why Read this Book xiii Who Are We? xv Acknowledgments xxi Step 1 Commit to Wanting Both a Career and Family: Rethinking Your Priorities 1 The Leadership Challenge 7 Our Definition of Balance 9 Critical Success Factors in Rethinking Your Priorities 12 ix Step 2 Pursue a Process that Creates Balance: Balancing What Is Most Important to You 13 Establish Boundaries Early On 18 Know Your Priorities 19 An Exercise in Perspective 23 Define Success on Your Own Terms 24 Critical Success Factors in Balancing What Is Most Important to You 25 Step 3 Make Choices and Accept the Consequences: Giving Up What You Don’t Want Badly Enough 27 Just Let It Go 28 Know Your Limits 31 Minimize Tradeoffs 33 Blind Tradeoffs 35 Say No 43 Don’t Feel Guilty 44 Critical Success Factors in Giving Up What You Don’t Want Badly Enough 47 Step 4 Choose a Career that Supports Balance: Making Your Balance Real 49 Choose Your Career Path Wisely 51 Three Fundamental Options 53 Four Key Career Levers 68 Critical Success Factors in Making Your Balance Real 71 Having It All…and Making It Work x Step 5 Involve Your Loved Ones in Creating Balance: Refining Your Balance 73 Four Strategies 74 Divide and Conquer? 84 Critical Success Factors in Refining Your Balance 85 Step 6 Review Your Balance to Retain or Regain It: Balance Is a Destination 87 This Journey Leads to a Destination 88 What Knocks Us Off Balance 88 Review Your Balance 90 Learn to Be Flexible 93 Your Back-to-Balance Plan 103 Six Steps to Career/ Family Balance 105 Step 1. Commit to Wanting Both a Career and Family: Rethinking Your Priorities 105 Step 2. Pursue a Process that Creates Balance: Balancing What Is Most Important to You 107 Step 3. Make Choices and Accept the Consequences: Giving Up What You Don’t Want Badly Enough 108 Step 4. Choose a Career that Supports Balance: Making Your Balance Real 110 Step 5. Involve Your Loved Ones in Creating Balance: Refining Your Balance 112 Step 6. Review Your Balance to Retain or Regain It: Balance Is a Destination 113 Contents xi This page intentionally left blank You wouldn’t be reading this book if you weren’t looking for an answer to the riddle of how to best manage the demands of your work and your personal life. Many books address the challenge of having both a career and family; however, most of them focus on describing work-life balance in terms of social, gender, historical, and economic factors—rarely getting around to what to do about the problem. This book focuses on a specific solution to the challenge of balancing career and family. xiii Introduction: Why Read this Book Our objective is to help empower you to create your own work–family balance by offering a very user-friendly action plan. We believe that defining a problem
is not the same as solving it. Thus, we have chosen to speculate on the problem only as much as necessary to understand better what we can do about it. We briefly define the work-family balance challenge in this Introduction; then our book is geared toward six proactive steps we can take individually. This focus facilitates a simple action plan for achieving work–family balance. Our goal is very simple: To help people find balance in their lives between career and family. To do this, we provide a focused six-step process: ■ Step 1. Commit to wanting both a career and family: Rethinking your priorities. ■ Step 2. Pursue a process that creates balance: Balancing what is most important to you. ■ Step 3. Make choices and accept the consequences: Giving up what you don’t want badly enough. ■ Step 4. Choose a career that supports balance: Making your balance real. ■ Step 5. Involve your loved ones in creating balance: Refining your balance. Having It All…and Making It Work xiv ■ Step 6. Review your balance to retain or regain it: Balance is a destination. Why this goal? Because we have discovered that many working professionals and emerging leaders struggle to achieve balance. We also see evidence that chronic imbalance causes serious problems at work and at home. Sadly, some people live in denial, at least until they experience a major wakeup call. They believe that problems in their personal lives with marriage and family relationships won’t affect their work or that problems at work won’t affect their family lives, but invariably an imbalance in one domain affects the other. Each chapter in this book consists of a series of personal stories and essential tips necessary to carry out each crucial step. Who Are We? We feel that the most effective way to address the challenge of work and family balance is to include the perspectives of many people—those who are at the cusp of embarking on a career track and starting a family, those who are juggling the demands of both worlds, and also those who are at the end of their career phase and whose children have left home. Introduction: Why Read this Book xv In preparing the content and ideas of this book, we worked with hundreds of professional people who are trying to achieve balance in their own lives. We interacted with them personally and discovered how they are grappling with balance in their own lives, and we learned much of value from their successes and their failures. The diversity of those we worked with in preparing this book is reflected in us, the authors, and we want to share with you our motivation and interest in writing this book. Quinn Mills I have been a professor at the Harvard Business School for many years. Many of my friends are now far along in their careers and have deep regrets about how little of themselves they shared with their spouses and with their children as they were growing up. They wish they had attained a better balance in their lives. Many of my stu
dents have told me that they are afraid that the same thing will happen to them—that years from now they’ll finish their careers with deep regret about all they missed of family life. But other students have an entirely different concern—that in a few years they’ll feel compelled to abandon promising careers in Having It All…and Making It Work xvi order to have a family. They fear the sort of imbalance that means giving up a career to have a family. People struggle so much with these issues that they frequently retreat into illusions about them, promising themselves that if they do this or that, they’ll somehow find the balance that is otherwise so difficult to attain. I spoke at length to the people who were said to be most successful at achieving balance and with others who had failed and were consumed with bitterness and regret. From conversations, reading, observation, and life experience, I created a unique approach to achieving balance. I wrote this book to share this approach with you, hoping that you might find balance in your own lives. I hope that you will take away from this book the conviction that balance is possible and that you can change your life to make balance a reality for you and your loved ones. I have had the personal blessing of wonderful children and have struggled with balance between career and family for many years. Several of the techniques in this book I discovered in my personal life and found them effective; some I learned from others. Finding proper balance is one of the most important things in each of our lives today. Introduction: Why Read this Book xvii Sasha Mattu When I was younger, I never thought of having a family as a choice—it was just something that was part of my picture of success. I didn’t feel that I was asking for too much. It simply seemed that this was the way it was supposed to be if I just worked hard enough. Having played professional tennis, then graduating from Harvard, I realized that to maintain this kind of career intensity, I needed to make different choices to include a family in my life. I did not know that a rewarding career and loving family would compete for the same limited resources—my time and energy. The fanatic 100% dedication that it takes for me to be successful professionally is now the same definition that I have for my family—100% dedication of myself. How can I do both? Certainly, 100% to career + 100% to family = burnout or blowout. I have asked professionals around me who have both a career and family, and I have been overwhelmed by the spectrum of solutions I have seen. I was disappointed to find that many were still in the process of figuring it out for themselves—what does this mean for me with 20 years less experience? I then sought answers in books and found that most just defined the problem and didn’t tell me how I can create this balance for myself. Having It All…and Making It Work xviii I hope that this book is a tool for other young
people who are about to set out on a career, who are ambitious, hopeful, but who need guidance in thinking about the long road ahead. There are pitfalls that can sometimes be avoided if one is aware of them early on. This book is about life and its pitfalls, and more importantly, what to do about them. The pages that follow address the major pitfalls in our lives and the dangers of burnout and blowout. Kirstin Hornby I’m at an age when I must make decisions about how to structure my career and family. As I think about these issues, I have observed people around me, such as my parents and my colleagues—those who spend too much time at work and not enough with their families, and those who have given up their careers to have a family. I have also noticed people around me who are struggling to juggle both career and family. I have heard dozens of stories about women who’ve had to drop off a career track to have a family and who couldn’t get back on, and about those who realized they wanted to have a family, but it was too late. I’ve heard stories about dual-income families struggling to find time for everything and stories about divorced parents who can barely keep life together. I’ve begun to wonder whether Introduction: Why Read this Book xix there is any way to balance family and career so that one doesn’t have to be sacrificed for the other. I chose to research and write this book to help both others and myself by discovering whether balance is really possible. I learned that we cannot necessarily have everything in exactly the way we might have imagined, but that by looking at balance in a new way, it is possible to have both a happy family and a successful career. A Chinese proverb tells us that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. For us, the first step is a commitment to wanting both a career and a family. We invite you to join us in the journey. Having It All…and Making It Work xx xxi Acknowledgments We are deeply grateful to Jim Boyd and Ken Shelton, our editors, for their insightful contributions to this book. We are also grateful to the Harvard Business School Division of Research for its support in the research that is the basis for this book. Quinn Mills Kirstin Hornby Sasha Mattu This page intentionally left blank 1 1 Commit to Wanting Both a Career and Family: Rethinking Your Priorities You may feel at times that you must choose between having a successful career and having a great personal and family life. But we believe, based on our extensive research and personal life experience, that you can have both. You need not trade off your top priorities. Step 1 is an invitation to exercise the faith and courage to commit to wanting both a career and family. S T E P The tragedy of September 11, 2001 and the ongoing threat of terrorism highlight the need for each of us to rethink our priorities—to ask ourselves: ■ Do we really understand what is most important in
（三）Ideal career
Curre
ntly, the mostly concerned problem is the ideal career. More and more people have complained that it is really difficult for them to find an ideal career, that is to say, they have to engage themselves in the field that they are not enthusiastic about. It causes many problems to begin with; many people complain that they chose the wrong major in their college years which has a negative impact on their present conditions. And also they are not very active in their present position. They are at a loss. They try their best to find some solutions, but all efforts are of no avail. Only few of them can adjust their mindset. According to a survey, the majority of people engage themselves in the field that they are not interested in, but as for some people they can do very well. Of course, choosing an ideal job will arouse your initiative and enthusiasm and lay a solid foundation for your success, but that does not mean that you will succeed if you choose the right position.
In addition, more and more people have discovered that it is really difficult for them to strike a balance between career development and family obligation. The main cause is that more and more women have chosen to enter the work world. They are also eager to pursue what they like, thus they will no longer be a fulltime mother. They have to spend sufficient times at workshops or their companies, which will have a definite influence on their spending of time and energy. Some people think that they should return home and shoulder the responsibility as a mother. As a matter of fact, both women and men feel that they can’t maintain the work-family balance. They find much pressure imposed on them. However, they have to face it.
In my opinion, since they have made their choices, they should confront（处理，解决【眼前困难】；面对） themselves with that. They have to give it best shot to deal with the tricky （棘手的，复杂的）problem. As for the husband and wife, they should cooperate with each other to acquire a kind of balance between career and family.