The modest proposal及其译文
三清山在哪里-寿阳县人力资源和社会保障局
The modest proposal
It is a
melancholy object to those who walk through this
great town or
travel in the country, when they
see the streets, the roads, and cabin
doors,
crowded with beggars of the female sex, followed
by three, four,
or six children, all in rags
and importuning every passenger for an
alms.
These mothers, instead of being able to work for
their honest
livelihood, are forced to employ
all their time in strolling to beg
sustenance
for their helpless infants: who as they grow up
either turn
thieves for want of work, or leave
their dear native country to fight for
the
Pretender in Spain, or sell themselves to the
Barbadoes.
I think it is agreed by all parties
that this prodigious number of
children in the
arms, or on the backs, or at the heels of their
mothers,
and frequently of their fathers, is
in the present deplorable state of the
kingdom
a very great additional grievance; and, therefore,
whoever
could find out a fair, cheap, and easy
method of making these children
sound, useful
members of the commonwealth, would deserve so well
of the public as to have his statue set up for
a preserver of the nation.
But my intention is
very far from being confined to provide only for
the
children of professed beggars; it is of a
much greater extent, and shall
take in the
whole number of infants at a certain age who are
born of
parents in effect as little able to
support them as those who demand
our charity
in the streets.
”I have been assured by a very
knowing American of my
acquaintance in London,
that a young healthy child well
nursed is at a
year old a most delicious, nourishing, and
wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted,
baked, or
boiled ...”
As to my own part,
having turned my thoughts for many years upon
this important subject, and maturely weighed
the several schemes of
other projectors, I
have always found them grossly mistaken in the
computation. It is true, a child just dropped
from its dam may be
supported by her milk for
a solar year, with little other nourishment;
at most not above the value of 2s., which the
mother may certainly
get, or the value in
scraps, by her lawful occupation of begging; and
it
is exactly at one year old that I propose
to provide for them in such a
manner as
instead of being a charge upon their parents or
the parish,
or wanting food and raiment for
the rest of their lives, they shall on
the
contrary contribute to the feeding, and partly to
the clothing, of
many thousands.
There is
likewise another great advantage in my scheme,
that it will
prevent those voluntary
abortions, and that horrid practice of women
murdering their bastard children, alas! too
frequent among us!
sacrificing the poor
innocent babes I doubt more to avoid the expense
than the shame, which would move tears and
pity in the most savage
and inhuman breast.
The number of souls in this kingdom being
usually reckoned one
million and a half, of
these I calculate there may be about two hundred
thousand couple whose wives are breeders; from
which number I
subtract thirty thousand
couples who are able to maintain their own
children, although I apprehend there cannot be
so many, under the
present distresses of the
kingdom; but this being granted, there will
remain an hundred and seventy thousand
breeders. I again subtract
fifty thousand for
those women who miscarry, or whose children die
by accident or disease within the year. There
only remains one
hundred and twenty thousand
children of poor parents annually born.
The
question therefore is, how this number shall be
reared and
provided for, which, as I have
already said, under the present
situation of
affairs, is utterly impossible by all the methods
hitherto
proposed. For we can neither employ
them in handicraft or agriculture;
we neither
build houses (I mean in the country) nor cultivate
land:
they can very seldom pick up a
livelihood by stealing, till they arrive at
six years old, except where they are of
towardly parts, although I
confess they learn
the rudiments much earlier, during which time,
they can however be properly looked upon only
as probationers, as I
have been informed by a
principal gentleman in the county of Cavan,
who protested to me that he never knew above
one or two instances
under the age of six,
even in a part of the kingdom so renowned for
the quickest proficiency in that art.
I am
assured by our merchants, that a boy or a girl
before twelve
years old is no salable
commodity; and even when they come to this
age
they will not yield above three pounds, or three
pounds and
half-a-crown at most on the
exchange; which cannot turn to account
either
to the parents or kingdom, the charge of nutriment
and rags
having been at least four times that
value.
I shall now therefore humbly propose my
own thoughts, which I hope
will not be liable
to the least objection.
I have been assured by
a very knowing American of my acquaintance
in
London, that a young healthy child well nursed is
at a year old a
most delicious, nourishing,
and wholesome food, whether stewed,
roasted,
baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will
equally
serve in a fricassee or a ragout.
I do therefore humbly offer it to public
consideration that of the
hundred and twenty
thousand children already computed, twenty
thousand may be reserved for breed, whereof
only one-fourth part to
be males; which is
more than we allow to sheep, black cattle or
swine;
and my reason is, that these children
are seldom the fruits of
marriage, a
circumstance not much regarded by our savages,
therefore one male will be sufficient to serve
four females. That the
remaining hundred
thousand may, at a year old, be offered in the
sale
to the persons of quality and fortune
through the kingdom; always
advising the
mother to let them suck plentifully in the last
month, so
as to render them plump and fat for
a good table. A child will make
two dishes at
an entertainment for friends; and when the family
dines
alone, the fore or hind quarter will
make a reasonable dish, and
seasoned with a
little pepper or salt will be very good boiled on
the
fourth day, especially in winter.
I
have reckoned upon a medium that a child just born
will weigh 12
pounds, and in a solar year, if
tolerably nursed, increaseth to 28
pounds.
I grant this food will be somewhat dear, and
therefore very proper for
landlords, who, as
they have already devoured most of the parents,
seem to have the best title to the children.
Infant's flesh will be in season throughout
the year, but more plentiful
in March, and a
little before and after; for we are told by a
grave
author, an eminent French physician,
that fish being a prolific diet,
there are
more children born in Roman Catholic countries
about nine
months after Lent than at any other
season; therefore, reckoning a
year after
Lent, the markets will be more glutted than usual,
because
the number of popish infants is at
least three to one in this kingdom:
and
therefore it will have one other collateral
advantage, by lessening
the number of papists
among us.
I have already computed the charge
of nursing a beggar's child (in
which list I
reckon all cottagers, laborers, and four-fifths of
the
farmers) to be about two shillings per
annum, rags included; and I
believe no
gentleman would repine to give ten shillings for
the carcass
of a good fat child, which, as I
have said, will make four dishes of
excellent
nutritive meat, when he hath only some particular
friend or
his own family to dine with him.
Thus the squire will learn to be a good
landlord, and grow popular among his tenants;
the mother will have
eight shillings net
profit, and be fit for work till she produces
another
child.
Those who are more thrifty
(as I must confess the times require) may
flay
the carcass; the skin of which artificially
dressed will make
admirable gloves for ladies,
and summer boots for fine gentlemen.
As to our
city of Dublin, shambles may be appointed for this
purpose
in the most convenient parts of it,
and butchers we may be assured
will not be
wanting; although I rather recommend buying the
children
alive, and dressing them hot from the
knife, as we do roasting pigs.
A very worthy
person, a true lover of his country, and whose
virtues I
highly esteem, was lately pleased in
discoursing on this matter to
offer a
refinement upon my scheme. He said that many
gentlemen of
this kingdom, having of late
destroyed their deer, he conceived that
the
want of venison might be well supplied by the
bodies of young lads
and maidens, not
exceeding fourteen years of age nor under twelve;
so great a number of both sexes in every
country being now ready to
starve for want of
work and service; and these to be disposed of by
their parents, if alive, or otherwise by their
nearest relations. But with
due deference to
so excellent a friend and so deserving a patriot,
I
cannot be altogether in his sentiments; for
as to the males, my
American acquaintance
assured me, from frequent experience, that
their flesh was generally tough and lean, like
that of our schoolboys by
continual exercise,
and their taste disagreeable; and to fatten them
would not answer the charge. Then as to the
females, it would, I think,
with humble
submission be a loss to the public, because they
soon
would become breeders themselves; and
besides, it is not improbable
that some
scrupulous people might be apt to censure such a
practice
(although indeed very unjustly), as a
little bordering upon cruelty;
which, I
confess, hath always been with me the strongest
objection
against any project, however so well
intended.
But in order to justify my friend,
he confessed that this expedient was
put into
his head by the famous Psalmanazar, a native of
the island
Formosa, who came from thence to
London above twenty years ago,
and in
conversation told my friend, that in his country
when any young
person happened to be put to
death, the executioner sold the carcass
to
persons of quality as a prime dainty; and that in
his time the body
of a plump girl of fifteen,
who was crucified for an attempt to poison
the
emperor, was sold to his imperial majesty's prime
minister of state,
and other great mandarins
of the court, in joints from the gibbet, at
four hundred crowns. Neither indeed can I
deny, that if the same use
were made of
several plump young girls in this town, who
without one
single groat to their fortunes
cannot stir abroad without a chair, and
appear
at playhouse and assemblies in foreign fineries
which they
never will pay for, the kingdom
would not be the worse.
Some persons of a
desponding spirit are in great concern about that
vast number of poor people, who are aged,
diseased, or maimed, and
I have been desired
to employ my thoughts what course may be taken
to ease the nation of so grievous an
encumbrance. But I am not in the
least pain
upon that matter, because it is very well known
that they
are every day dying and rotting by
cold and famine, and filth and
vermin, as fast
as can be reasonably expected. And as to the young
laborers, they are now in as hopeful a
condition; they cannot get work,
and
consequently pine away for want of nourishment, to
a degree that
if at any time they are
accidentally hired to common labor, they have
not strength to perform it; and thus the
country and themselves are
happily
delivered from the evils to come.
I have too
long digressed, and therefore shall return to my
subject. I
think the advantages by the
proposal which I have made are obvious
and
many, as well as of the highest importance.
For first, as I have already observed, it
would greatly lessen the
number of papists,
with whom we are yearly overrun, being the
principal breeders of the nation as well as
our most dangerous
enemies; and who stay at
home on purpose with a design to deliver
the
kingdom to the Pretender, hoping to take their
advantage by the
absence of so many good
protestants, who have chosen rather to
leave
their country than stay at home and pay tithes
against their
conscience to an episcopal
curate.
Secondly, The poorer tenants will have
something valuable of their
own, which by law
may be made liable to distress and help to pay
their
landlord's rent, their corn and cattle
being already seized, and money
a thing
unknown.
Thirdly, Whereas the maintenance of
an hundred thousand children,
from two years
old and upward, cannot be computed at less than
ten
shillings a-piece per annum, the nation's
stock will be thereby
increased fifty thousand
pounds per annum, beside the profit of a new
dish introduced to the tables of all gentlemen
of fortune in the
kingdom who have any
refinement in taste. And the money will
circulate among ourselves, the goods being
entirely of our own
growth and manufacture.
Fourthly, The constant breeders, beside the
gain of eight shillings
sterling per annum by
the sale of their children, will be rid of the
charge of maintaining them after the first
year.
Fifthly, This food would likewise bring
great custom to taverns; where
the vintners
will certainly be so prudent as to procure the
best receipts
for dressing it to perfection,
and consequently have their houses
frequented
by all the fine gentlemen, who justly value
themselves
upon their knowledge in good
eating: and a skilful cook, who
understands
how to oblige his guests, will contrive to make it
as
expensive as they please.
Sixthly, This
would be a great inducement to marriage, which all
wise
nations have either encouraged by rewards
or enforced by laws and
penalties. It would
increase the care and tenderness of mothers
toward their children, when they were sure of
a settlement for life to
the poor babes,
provided in some sort by the public, to their
annual
profit instead of expense. We should
see an honest emulation among
the married
women, which of them could bring the fattest child
to the
market. Men would become as fond of
their wives during the time of
their pregnancy
as they are now of their mares in foal, their cows
in
calf, their sows when they are ready to
farrow; nor offer to beat or kick
them
(as is too frequent a practice) for fear of a
miscarriage.
Many other advantages might be
enumerated. For instance, the
addition of some
thousand carcasses in our exportation of barreled
beef, the propagation of swine's flesh, and
improvement in the art of
making good bacon,
so much wanted among us by the great
destruction of pigs, too frequent at our
tables; which are no way
comparable in taste
or magnificence to a well-grown, fat, yearling
child, which roasted whole will make a
considerable figure at a lord
mayor's feast or
any other public entertainment. But this and many
others I omit, being studious of brevity.
Supposing that one thousand families in this
city, would be constant
customers for infants
flesh, besides others who might have it at merry
meetings, particularly at weddings and
christenings, I compute that
Dublin would take
off annually about twenty thousand carcasses; and
the rest of the kingdom (where probably they
will be sold somewhat
cheaper) the remaining
eighty thousand.
I can think of no one
objection, that will possibly be raised against
this
proposal, unless it should be urged, that
the number of people will be
thereby much
lessened in the kingdom. This I freely own, and
'twas
indeed one principal design in offering
it to the world. I desire the
reader will
observe, that I calculate my remedy for this one
individual
Kingdom of Ireland, and for no
other that ever was, is, or, I think, ever
can
be upon Earth. Therefore let no man talk to me of
other
expedients: Of taxing our absentees at
five shillings a pound: Of using
neither
cloaths, nor houshold furniture, except what is of
our own
growth and manufacture: Of utterly
rejecting the materials and
instruments that
promote foreign luxury: Of curing the
expensiveness
of pride, vanity, idleness, and
gaming in our women: Of introducing a
vein of
parsimony, prudence and temperance: Of learning to
love our
country, wherein we differ even from
Laplanders, and the inhabitants
of Topinamboo:
Of quitting our animosities and factions, nor
acting
any longer like the Jews, who were
murdering one another at the very
moment their
city was taken: Of being a little cautious not to
sell our
country and consciences for nothing:
Of teaching landlords to have at
least one
degree of mercy towards their tenants. Lastly, of
putting a
spirit of honesty, industry, and
skill into our shop-keepers, who, if a
resolution could now be taken to buy only our
native goods, would
immediately unite to cheat
and exact upon us in the price, the
measure,
and the goodness, nor could ever yet be brought to
make
one fair proposal of just dealing, though
often and earnestly invited to
it.
Therefore I repeat, let no man talk to me of
these and the like
expedients, 'till he hath
at least some glympse of hope, that there will
ever be some hearty and sincere attempt to put
them into practice.
But, as to my self,
having been wearied out for many years with
offering vain, idle, visionary thoughts, and
at length utterly despairing
of success, I
fortunately fell upon this proposal, which, as it
is wholly
new, so it hath something solid and
real, of no expence and little
trouble, full
in our own power, and whereby we can incur no
danger in
disobliging England. For this kind
of commodity will not bear
exportation, and
flesh being of too tender a consistence, to admit
a
long continuance in salt, although perhaps I
could name a country,
which would be glad to
eat up our whole nation without it.
After all,
I am not so violently bent upon my own opinion as
to reject
any offer proposed by wise men,
which shall be found equally
innocent, cheap,
easy, and effectual. But before something of that
kind shall be advanced in contradiction to my
scheme, and offering a
better, I desire the
author or authors will be pleased maturely to
consider two points. First, as things now
stand, how they will be able
to find food and
raiment for an hundred thousand useless mouths and
backs. And secondly, there being a round
million of creatures in
human figure
throughout this kingdom, whose whole subsistence
put
into a common stock would leave them in
debt two millions of pounds
sterling, adding
those who are beggars by profession to the bulk of
farmers, cottagers, and laborers, with their
wives and children who
are beggars in effect:
I desire those politicians who dislike my
overture, and may perhaps be so bold as to
attempt an answer, that
they will first ask
the parents of these mortals, whether they would
not at this day think it a great happiness to
have been sold for food, at
a year old in the
manner I prescribe, and thereby have avoided such
a perpetual scene of misfortunes as they have
since gone through by
the oppression of
landlords, the impossibility of paying rent
without
money or trade, the want of common
sustenance, with neither house
nor clothes to
cover them from the inclemencies of the weather,
and
the most inevitable prospect of entailing
the like or greater miseries
upon their breed
for ever.
I profess, in the sincerity of my
heart, that I have not the least
personal
interest in endeavoring to promote this necessary
work,
having no other motive than the public
good of my country, by
advancing our trade,
providing for infants, relieving the poor, and
giving some pleasure to the rich. I have no
children by which I can
propose to get a
single penny; the youngest being nine years old,
and
my wife past child-bearing.
The End
翻译
一个谦虚的建议
为了阻止那些穷人的孩子成为他们父母和国家的负担，并让他们造福于社会
那确实是令人悲伤
的，当我们在爱尔兰这个国家旅行，在这个城镇步行的时候，看见街上、
大道边、小屋的门前，挤着一大
堆的乞讨妇女！她们后面跟着3个、4个、甚至6个孩子。这
些人个个都穿着破布衣裳，乞讨着每一个路
人的施舍。这些妈妈，不是去老老实实的干活儿
谋生，而是被迫将她们的时间全部花费在为他们的无助的
婴儿闲逛在大街上乞讨粮食。这些
婴儿，当他们长大的时候，要么因为想找工作而变成贼，要么离开他们
亲爱的祖国为别国卖
命，或者卖身与巴巴多斯。
我想这是所有党派人士都赞同的，这么多在怀
里抱着的、背着的、母亲教脚站着的那些孩子，
在目前国家这种可悲的状态下是一个极大的带着额外的不
幸！因此，无论谁，只要能找到一
个公平的、花费较少的、容易的方法使这些孩子健康，那么这个共和政
体的有效公民将会赢
得公众的称赞，并且公众会为他塑一座国家保护着的雕像。
但是我的建议
远远不局限于为那些自我认定为乞丐的孩子所提供。它有一个更大的范围，并
且能够将那些父母养不起，
需要在大街乞讨我们的善心来过活的孩子，在一定的年龄段起到
作用。
对于我个人来说，这一
重要想法在脑海里已经闪现了很多年了，并且在前几位建议者的方案
下日趋成熟。我已经发现了他们在计
算中的很大的错误。那的确是真的，一个刚刚从母亲身
上落地的孩子，可能最多需要一点奶水和一点点其
他的营养品。最多不过于两个先令的价值
或者是点儿碎步的价值，这点价值母亲可以通过合法的乞讨自然
而然的得到。大概在一岁的
时候，我建议用这样的方法来喂他们----他们应该相反地成百上千倍的回
报养育和部分的衣
服费用，而不是成为他们父母或者向教区要钱或者食物和衣服来供给他们下半生生活的
负
累！
在我的这个计划中同样的还有另外一个好处，那就是阻止那些人故意堕
胎。那些妇女谋杀自
己的私生子的令人厌恶的事情在我们中间频繁的发生。我怀疑，她们更多的是想去避
免开支
而不是想逃脱羞耻。这种做法，就是最不开化的人和牲畜也会为之落泪，感到惋惜！
这
个国家的人口一般来说有150万。在这些人中间，我算了算大概有20万的夫妻中妻子生了
过多的孩子
。从这中间我减去3万的能够养育她们孩子的夫妻（虽然我明白在目前这个国家
的危难之下不可能有这么
多人），但是，让大家所欣慰的是这里将还会有17万的养育孩子的
人。我再减去5万流产的妇女，或者
是在一年里面那些意外死亡或者因为疾病而故的孩子，
这儿每年将会只剩下12万穷人的孩子能够出生。
因此，现在的问题是：这些孩子怎么被养活
并提供给他们食物？正如我前面所说的，在现在国家的状况下
，通过目前为止所提出的各种
方法是完全不可能的。因为我们既不可能把他们聘用到手工业也不能到农场
；我们既没有在
农村给他们建造房屋也没有给他们可耕种的土地。在六岁之前，他们不可能靠偷窃来过活
,
除非他们有这种偷窃的天赋。虽然我承认他们更早的学习了一些基本技巧。然而在那段时间
他
们仅仅被当做是试用人员。正如我前面所提到的卡文村绅士的规则一样，他抗议我说他从
来没发现有低于
六岁的孩子能够工作这样的例子，即使是那些在艺术上又快又熟练而享有声
望的地方也没有！
The modest proposal
It is a melancholy object to those who
walk through this great town or
travel in the
country, when they see the streets, the roads, and
cabin
doors, crowded with beggars of the
female sex, followed by three, four,
or six
children, all in rags and importuning every
passenger for an
alms. These mothers, instead
of being able to work for their honest
livelihood, are forced to employ all their
time in strolling to beg
sustenance for their
helpless infants: who as they grow up either turn
thieves for want of work, or leave their dear
native country to fight for
the Pretender in
Spain, or sell themselves to the Barbadoes.
I
think it is agreed by all parties that this
prodigious number of
children in the arms, or
on the backs, or at the heels of their mothers,
and frequently of their fathers, is in the
present deplorable state of the
kingdom a very
great additional grievance; and, therefore,
whoever
could find out a fair, cheap, and easy
method of making these children
sound, useful
members of the commonwealth, would deserve so well
of the public as to have his statue set up for
a preserver of the nation.
But my intention is
very far from being confined to provide only for
the
children of professed beggars; it is of a
much greater extent, and shall
take in the
whole number of infants at a certain age who are
born of
parents in effect as little able to
support them as those who demand
our charity
in the streets.
”I have been assured by a very
knowing American of my
acquaintance in London,
that a young healthy child well
nursed is at a
year old a most delicious, nourishing, and
wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted,
baked, or
boiled ...”
As to my own part,
having turned my thoughts for many years upon
this important subject, and maturely weighed
the several schemes of
other projectors, I
have always found them grossly mistaken in the
computation. It is true, a child just dropped
from its dam may be
supported by her milk for
a solar year, with little other nourishment;
at most not above the value of 2s., which the
mother may certainly
get, or the value in
scraps, by her lawful occupation of begging; and
it
is exactly at one year old that I propose
to provide for them in such a
manner as
instead of being a charge upon their parents or
the parish,
or wanting food and raiment for
the rest of their lives, they shall on
the
contrary contribute to the feeding, and partly to
the clothing, of
many thousands.
There is
likewise another great advantage in my scheme,
that it will
prevent those voluntary
abortions, and that horrid practice of women
murdering their bastard children, alas! too
frequent among us!
sacrificing the poor
innocent babes I doubt more to avoid the expense
than the shame, which would move tears and
pity in the most savage
and inhuman breast.
The number of souls in this kingdom being
usually reckoned one
million and a half, of
these I calculate there may be about two hundred
thousand couple whose wives are breeders; from
which number I
subtract thirty thousand
couples who are able to maintain their own
children, although I apprehend there cannot be
so many, under the
present distresses of the
kingdom; but this being granted, there will
remain an hundred and seventy thousand
breeders. I again subtract
fifty thousand for
those women who miscarry, or whose children die
by accident or disease within the year. There
only remains one
hundred and twenty thousand
children of poor parents annually born.
The
question therefore is, how this number shall be
reared and
provided for, which, as I have
already said, under the present
situation of
affairs, is utterly impossible by all the methods
hitherto
proposed. For we can neither employ
them in handicraft or agriculture;
we neither
build houses (I mean in the country) nor cultivate
land:
they can very seldom pick up a
livelihood by stealing, till they arrive at
six years old, except where they are of
towardly parts, although I
confess they learn
the rudiments much earlier, during which time,
they can however be properly looked upon only
as probationers, as I
have been informed by a
principal gentleman in the county of Cavan,
who protested to me that he never knew above
one or two instances
under the age of six,
even in a part of the kingdom so renowned for
the quickest proficiency in that art.
I am
assured by our merchants, that a boy or a girl
before twelve
years old is no salable
commodity; and even when they come to this
age
they will not yield above three pounds, or three
pounds and
half-a-crown at most on the
exchange; which cannot turn to account
either
to the parents or kingdom, the charge of nutriment
and rags
having been at least four times that
value.
I shall now therefore humbly propose my
own thoughts, which I hope
will not be liable
to the least objection.
I have been assured by
a very knowing American of my acquaintance
in
London, that a young healthy child well nursed is
at a year old a
most delicious, nourishing,
and wholesome food, whether stewed,
roasted,
baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will
equally
serve in a fricassee or a ragout.
I do therefore humbly offer it to public
consideration that of the
hundred and twenty
thousand children already computed, twenty
thousand may be reserved for breed, whereof
only one-fourth part to
be males; which is
more than we allow to sheep, black cattle or
swine;
and my reason is, that these children
are seldom the fruits of
marriage, a
circumstance not much regarded by our savages,
therefore one male will be sufficient to serve
four females. That the
remaining hundred
thousand may, at a year old, be offered in the
sale
to the persons of quality and fortune
through the kingdom; always
advising the
mother to let them suck plentifully in the last
month, so
as to render them plump and fat for
a good table. A child will make
two dishes at
an entertainment for friends; and when the family
dines
alone, the fore or hind quarter will
make a reasonable dish, and
seasoned with a
little pepper or salt will be very good boiled on
the
fourth day, especially in winter.
I
have reckoned upon a medium that a child just born
will weigh 12
pounds, and in a solar year, if
tolerably nursed, increaseth to 28
pounds.
I grant this food will be somewhat dear, and
therefore very proper for
landlords, who, as
they have already devoured most of the parents,
seem to have the best title to the children.
Infant's flesh will be in season throughout
the year, but more plentiful
in March, and a
little before and after; for we are told by a
grave
author, an eminent French physician,
that fish being a prolific diet,
there are
more children born in Roman Catholic countries
about nine
months after Lent than at any other
season; therefore, reckoning a
year after
Lent, the markets will be more glutted than usual,
because
the number of popish infants is at
least three to one in this kingdom:
and
therefore it will have one other collateral
advantage, by lessening
the number of papists
among us.
I have already computed the charge
of nursing a beggar's child (in
which list I
reckon all cottagers, laborers, and four-fifths of
the
farmers) to be about two shillings per
annum, rags included; and I
believe no
gentleman would repine to give ten shillings for
the carcass
of a good fat child, which, as I
have said, will make four dishes of
excellent
nutritive meat, when he hath only some particular
friend or
his own family to dine with him.
Thus the squire will learn to be a good
landlord, and grow popular among his tenants;
the mother will have
eight shillings net
profit, and be fit for work till she produces
another
child.
Those who are more thrifty
(as I must confess the times require) may
flay
the carcass; the skin of which artificially
dressed will make
admirable gloves for ladies,
and summer boots for fine gentlemen.
As to our
city of Dublin, shambles may be appointed for this
purpose
in the most convenient parts of it,
and butchers we may be assured
will not be
wanting; although I rather recommend buying the
children
alive, and dressing them hot from the
knife, as we do roasting pigs.
A very worthy
person, a true lover of his country, and whose
virtues I
highly esteem, was lately pleased in
discoursing on this matter to
offer a
refinement upon my scheme. He said that many
gentlemen of
this kingdom, having of late
destroyed their deer, he conceived that
the
want of venison might be well supplied by the
bodies of young lads
and maidens, not
exceeding fourteen years of age nor under twelve;
so great a number of both sexes in every
country being now ready to
starve for want of
work and service; and these to be disposed of by
their parents, if alive, or otherwise by their
nearest relations. But with
due deference to
so excellent a friend and so deserving a patriot,
I
cannot be altogether in his sentiments; for
as to the males, my
American acquaintance
assured me, from frequent experience, that
their flesh was generally tough and lean, like
that of our schoolboys by
continual exercise,
and their taste disagreeable; and to fatten them
would not answer the charge. Then as to the
females, it would, I think,
with humble
submission be a loss to the public, because they
soon
would become breeders themselves; and
besides, it is not improbable
that some
scrupulous people might be apt to censure such a
practice
(although indeed very unjustly), as a
little bordering upon cruelty;
which, I
confess, hath always been with me the strongest
objection
against any project, however so well
intended.
But in order to justify my friend,
he confessed that this expedient was
put into
his head by the famous Psalmanazar, a native of
the island
Formosa, who came from thence to
London above twenty years ago,
and in
conversation told my friend, that in his country
when any young
person happened to be put to
death, the executioner sold the carcass
to
persons of quality as a prime dainty; and that in
his time the body
of a plump girl of fifteen,
who was crucified for an attempt to poison
the
emperor, was sold to his imperial majesty's prime
minister of state,
and other great mandarins
of the court, in joints from the gibbet, at
four hundred crowns. Neither indeed can I
deny, that if the same use
were made of
several plump young girls in this town, who
without one
single groat to their fortunes
cannot stir abroad without a chair, and
appear
at playhouse and assemblies in foreign fineries
which they
never will pay for, the kingdom
would not be the worse.
Some persons of a
desponding spirit are in great concern about that
vast number of poor people, who are aged,
diseased, or maimed, and
I have been desired
to employ my thoughts what course may be taken
to ease the nation of so grievous an
encumbrance. But I am not in the
least pain
upon that matter, because it is very well known
that they
are every day dying and rotting by
cold and famine, and filth and
vermin, as fast
as can be reasonably expected. And as to the young
laborers, they are now in as hopeful a
condition; they cannot get work,
and
consequently pine away for want of nourishment, to
a degree that
if at any time they are
accidentally hired to common labor, they have
not strength to perform it; and thus the
country and themselves are
happily
delivered from the evils to come.
I have too
long digressed, and therefore shall return to my
subject. I
think the advantages by the
proposal which I have made are obvious
and
many, as well as of the highest importance.
For first, as I have already observed, it
would greatly lessen the
number of papists,
with whom we are yearly overrun, being the
principal breeders of the nation as well as
our most dangerous
enemies; and who stay at
home on purpose with a design to deliver
the
kingdom to the Pretender, hoping to take their
advantage by the
absence of so many good
protestants, who have chosen rather to
leave
their country than stay at home and pay tithes
against their
conscience to an episcopal
curate.
Secondly, The poorer tenants will have
something valuable of their
own, which by law
may be made liable to distress and help to pay
their
landlord's rent, their corn and cattle
being already seized, and money
a thing
unknown.
Thirdly, Whereas the maintenance of
an hundred thousand children,
from two years
old and upward, cannot be computed at less than
ten
shillings a-piece per annum, the nation's
stock will be thereby
increased fifty thousand
pounds per annum, beside the profit of a new
dish introduced to the tables of all gentlemen
of fortune in the
kingdom who have any
refinement in taste. And the money will
circulate among ourselves, the goods being
entirely of our own
growth and manufacture.
Fourthly, The constant breeders, beside the
gain of eight shillings
sterling per annum by
the sale of their children, will be rid of the
charge of maintaining them after the first
year.
Fifthly, This food would likewise bring
great custom to taverns; where
the vintners
will certainly be so prudent as to procure the
best receipts
for dressing it to perfection,
and consequently have their houses
frequented
by all the fine gentlemen, who justly value
themselves
upon their knowledge in good
eating: and a skilful cook, who
understands
how to oblige his guests, will contrive to make it
as
expensive as they please.
Sixthly, This
would be a great inducement to marriage, which all
wise
nations have either encouraged by rewards
or enforced by laws and
penalties. It would
increase the care and tenderness of mothers
toward their children, when they were sure of
a settlement for life to
the poor babes,
provided in some sort by the public, to their
annual
profit instead of expense. We should
see an honest emulation among
the married
women, which of them could bring the fattest child
to the
market. Men would become as fond of
their wives during the time of
their pregnancy
as they are now of their mares in foal, their cows
in
calf, their sows when they are ready to
farrow; nor offer to beat or kick
them
(as is too frequent a practice) for fear of a
miscarriage.
Many other advantages might be
enumerated. For instance, the
addition of some
thousand carcasses in our exportation of barreled
beef, the propagation of swine's flesh, and
improvement in the art of
making good bacon,
so much wanted among us by the great
destruction of pigs, too frequent at our
tables; which are no way
comparable in taste
or magnificence to a well-grown, fat, yearling
child, which roasted whole will make a
considerable figure at a lord
mayor's feast or
any other public entertainment. But this and many
others I omit, being studious of brevity.
Supposing that one thousand families in this
city, would be constant
customers for infants
flesh, besides others who might have it at merry
meetings, particularly at weddings and
christenings, I compute that
Dublin would take
off annually about twenty thousand carcasses; and
the rest of the kingdom (where probably they
will be sold somewhat
cheaper) the remaining
eighty thousand.
I can think of no one
objection, that will possibly be raised against
this
proposal, unless it should be urged, that
the number of people will be
thereby much
lessened in the kingdom. This I freely own, and
'twas
indeed one principal design in offering
it to the world. I desire the
reader will
observe, that I calculate my remedy for this one
individual
Kingdom of Ireland, and for no
other that ever was, is, or, I think, ever
can
be upon Earth. Therefore let no man talk to me of
other
expedients: Of taxing our absentees at
five shillings a pound: Of using
neither
cloaths, nor houshold furniture, except what is of
our own
growth and manufacture: Of utterly
rejecting the materials and
instruments that
promote foreign luxury: Of curing the
expensiveness
of pride, vanity, idleness, and
gaming in our women: Of introducing a
vein of
parsimony, prudence and temperance: Of learning to
love our
country, wherein we differ even from
Laplanders, and the inhabitants
of Topinamboo:
Of quitting our animosities and factions, nor
acting
any longer like the Jews, who were
murdering one another at the very
moment their
city was taken: Of being a little cautious not to
sell our
country and consciences for nothing:
Of teaching landlords to have at
least one
degree of mercy towards their tenants. Lastly, of
putting a
spirit of honesty, industry, and
skill into our shop-keepers, who, if a
resolution could now be taken to buy only our
native goods, would
immediately unite to cheat
and exact upon us in the price, the
measure,
and the goodness, nor could ever yet be brought to
make
one fair proposal of just dealing, though
often and earnestly invited to
it.
Therefore I repeat, let no man talk to me of
these and the like
expedients, 'till he hath
at least some glympse of hope, that there will
ever be some hearty and sincere attempt to put
them into practice.
But, as to my self,
having been wearied out for many years with
offering vain, idle, visionary thoughts, and
at length utterly despairing
of success, I
fortunately fell upon this proposal, which, as it
is wholly
new, so it hath something solid and
real, of no expence and little
trouble, full
in our own power, and whereby we can incur no
danger in
disobliging England. For this kind
of commodity will not bear
exportation, and
flesh being of too tender a consistence, to admit
a
long continuance in salt, although perhaps I
could name a country,
which would be glad to
eat up our whole nation without it.
After all,
I am not so violently bent upon my own opinion as
to reject
any offer proposed by wise men,
which shall be found equally
innocent, cheap,
easy, and effectual. But before something of that
kind shall be advanced in contradiction to my
scheme, and offering a
better, I desire the
author or authors will be pleased maturely to
consider two points. First, as things now
stand, how they will be able
to find food and
raiment for an hundred thousand useless mouths and
backs. And secondly, there being a round
million of creatures in
human figure
throughout this kingdom, whose whole subsistence
put
into a common stock would leave them in
debt two millions of pounds
sterling, adding
those who are beggars by profession to the bulk of
farmers, cottagers, and laborers, with their
wives and children who
are beggars in effect:
I desire those politicians who dislike my
overture, and may perhaps be so bold as to
attempt an answer, that
they will first ask
the parents of these mortals, whether they would
not at this day think it a great happiness to
have been sold for food, at
a year old in the
manner I prescribe, and thereby have avoided such
a perpetual scene of misfortunes as they have
since gone through by
the oppression of
landlords, the impossibility of paying rent
without
money or trade, the want of common
sustenance, with neither house
nor clothes to
cover them from the inclemencies of the weather,
and
the most inevitable prospect of entailing
the like or greater miseries
upon their breed
for ever.
I profess, in the sincerity of my
heart, that I have not the least
personal
interest in endeavoring to promote this necessary
work,
having no other motive than the public
good of my country, by
advancing our trade,
providing for infants, relieving the poor, and
giving some pleasure to the rich. I have no
children by which I can
propose to get a
single penny; the youngest being nine years old,
and
my wife past child-bearing.
The End
翻译
一个谦虚的建议
为了阻止那些穷人的孩子成为他们父母和国家的负担，并让他们造福于社会
那确实是令人悲伤
的，当我们在爱尔兰这个国家旅行，在这个城镇步行的时候，看见街上、
大道边、小屋的门前，挤着一大
堆的乞讨妇女！她们后面跟着3个、4个、甚至6个孩子。这
些人个个都穿着破布衣裳，乞讨着每一个路
人的施舍。这些妈妈，不是去老老实实的干活儿
谋生，而是被迫将她们的时间全部花费在为他们的无助的
婴儿闲逛在大街上乞讨粮食。这些
婴儿，当他们长大的时候，要么因为想找工作而变成贼，要么离开他们
亲爱的祖国为别国卖
命，或者卖身与巴巴多斯。
我想这是所有党派人士都赞同的，这么多在怀
里抱着的、背着的、母亲教脚站着的那些孩子，
在目前国家这种可悲的状态下是一个极大的带着额外的不
幸！因此，无论谁，只要能找到一
个公平的、花费较少的、容易的方法使这些孩子健康，那么这个共和政
体的有效公民将会赢
得公众的称赞，并且公众会为他塑一座国家保护着的雕像。
但是我的建议
远远不局限于为那些自我认定为乞丐的孩子所提供。它有一个更大的范围，并
且能够将那些父母养不起，
需要在大街乞讨我们的善心来过活的孩子，在一定的年龄段起到
作用。
对于我个人来说，这一
重要想法在脑海里已经闪现了很多年了，并且在前几位建议者的方案
下日趋成熟。我已经发现了他们在计
算中的很大的错误。那的确是真的，一个刚刚从母亲身
上落地的孩子，可能最多需要一点奶水和一点点其
他的营养品。最多不过于两个先令的价值
或者是点儿碎步的价值，这点价值母亲可以通过合法的乞讨自然
而然的得到。大概在一岁的
时候，我建议用这样的方法来喂他们----他们应该相反地成百上千倍的回
报养育和部分的衣
服费用，而不是成为他们父母或者向教区要钱或者食物和衣服来供给他们下半生生活的
负
累！
在我的这个计划中同样的还有另外一个好处，那就是阻止那些人故意堕
胎。那些妇女谋杀自
己的私生子的令人厌恶的事情在我们中间频繁的发生。我怀疑，她们更多的是想去避
免开支
而不是想逃脱羞耻。这种做法，就是最不开化的人和牲畜也会为之落泪，感到惋惜！
这
个国家的人口一般来说有150万。在这些人中间，我算了算大概有20万的夫妻中妻子生了
过多的孩子
。从这中间我减去3万的能够养育她们孩子的夫妻（虽然我明白在目前这个国家
的危难之下不可能有这么
多人），但是，让大家所欣慰的是这里将还会有17万的养育孩子的
人。我再减去5万流产的妇女，或者
是在一年里面那些意外死亡或者因为疾病而故的孩子，
这儿每年将会只剩下12万穷人的孩子能够出生。
因此，现在的问题是：这些孩子怎么被养活
并提供给他们食物？正如我前面所说的，在现在国家的状况下
，通过目前为止所提出的各种
方法是完全不可能的。因为我们既不可能把他们聘用到手工业也不能到农场
；我们既没有在
农村给他们建造房屋也没有给他们可耕种的土地。在六岁之前，他们不可能靠偷窃来过活
,
除非他们有这种偷窃的天赋。虽然我承认他们更早的学习了一些基本技巧。然而在那段时间
他
们仅仅被当做是试用人员。正如我前面所提到的卡文村绅士的规则一样，他抗议我说他从
来没发现有低于
六岁的孩子能够工作这样的例子，即使是那些在艺术上又快又熟练而享有声
望的地方也没有！