外宣翻译中的编译技巧
打破常规作文-刚小希
外宣翻译中的编译技巧
一、删减
英文是一种讲究客观理
性的语言,以平实为好。而汉语则相反,追求表达高雅,喜欢借
助于同义反复来实现这种高雅的韵味。这
种表达如果照直翻译成英语,不但显得多余别扭,
还会削弱甚至破坏原意表达,一般宜做删减处理。此外
,某些在原文中非主要信息的地名、
人名(领导),对外国读者来说很陌生,翻译出来,不仅使译文冗余
,削弱原文主题的突出性,
还有可能外国读者失去阅读兴趣,也宜删减这类信息。例如:
例 1
原文:玉林市邮政大厦位于玉林市繁华商业地段, 坐落在人民路与东明路交叉点——人
民中路32号。紧邻玉林市委和市政府办公地点。交通便利,往东郊直达汽车站仅5分钟,
往火
车站也不过15分钟。
原译: Post Hotel is located at
No.32 People’s Road, in the commercial district.
At the crossing
with People’s Road and
Dongming Road, nearby the CPC of Yulin Committee
and Yulin Municipal
People’s Government. It is
only 5 minutes away from east suburb bus station
and only 15 minutes
from railways station by
car.
改译: Post Hotel is located in the
commercial district of the city with easy access
to public
transport. It is only 5 minutes from
east suburb bus station and 15 minutes from the
railways station
by car.
(此例出自 周锰珍.
基于目的论的对外宣传资料翻译 [J]. 广西民族大学学报(哲社版),
2006
(6):138-141.)
例 2
原文:山西省五台山是闻名中外的佛教圣地
,境内迄今仍存着北魏、唐、宋、元、明、
清及民国历朝历代的寺庙建筑47座。精美绝伦的古建筑艺术
、稀世文物及博大雄宏的佛教文
化充满了无限的神秘感。同时,五台山的自然风光亦令人陶醉,夏季清凉
宜人,而一到冬天,
漫天的飞雪该地而来,整个台怀景区便成了银装玉砌的冰雪世界。
On Wutai Mountain, located in Shanxi province,
there are 47 temples built during the seven
dynasties from Northern Wei (386-543) to the
Republic of China (1912-1949). Splendid ancient
architecture, rare relics and unparalleled
Buddhist culture have all lent mystery to the
mountain. Its
natural landscape is also
gorgeous. Cool and verdant in summer, the mountain
becomes shrouded in
snow and ice in winter.
汉、英读者的社会历史背景,心理认知环境不一样,各自的关注点也不一样。汉语突出
历朝历代是为了表示其历史悠久,文化丰富,因为中国人一看就懂,而国外读者可能就不太
清楚,而且这
些信息也不是他们所期望的。因此,译文仅仅保留了两个朝代以说明年代起止,
1
并加注了具体时间,将中间价值度不高的非关键信息的各朝各代省去不译,用了“七个朝代”一言以蔽之,这就免去了很多麻烦,时间也变得更为清晰,还保持了译文的通畅。同时,对
原文中的
一些评价性信息的省略也处理得十分恰当,使译文主题突出,简明扼要,注意了内
外有别。
例 3
原文:旅居在这半城绿树半城楼的现代园林都市之中,实为惬意而舒适之
快事。南宁市目
前共有82家星级饭店,其中五星级6家,四星级11家,三星级28家,既有装修豪华
的高级
酒店,又有温馨如家的经济型宾馆,满足南来北往的客人不同的需求。
原译: It
is really agreeable to live in such a garden city
half surrounded by green. At present,
Nanning
has totally 82 start-rated hotels, including 6
five-star hotels, 11 four-star hotels and 28
three-star hotels.Apart from the luxurious
hotels, there are also many comfortable economic
hotels
to satisfy customers’ various demands.
(选自《走进绿城南宁》旅游手册)
分析:原文是手册中“住”部分的信息,旨在给游客提供旅游数字式的住宿信息, 但第
一句“
旅居在这半城绿树半城楼的现代园林都市之中,实为惬意而舒适之快事”实际与此主
题不符,翻译出不仅
不能突出主题,而且会使译文缺乏连贯。因此,笔者采取删减这一部分
信息;此外,原译文“comfo
rtable economic hotels to satisfy customers’
various demands”有明
显的逻辑错误,“economic
hotels”如何能满足“various
demands”?因此,这段话只译出最
直接、最主要的信息即可。
改译:At
present, Nanning has totally 82 start-rated
hotels, of which 6 are five-star hotels, 11
are four-star hotels and 28 are three-star
hotels. Besides, there are many economic but
comfortable
hotels. (司继涛 译)
例 4
原文:具有3000多年建城史的北京, 是中华传统文化的典型代表,奥运会如在这里举行,
将使东西方文化在世界人口五分之一的国度中交融。一个在改革开放进程中蓬勃发展的新北
京,将以古典
与现代合壁的姿态,把自己悠远深厚的文化底蕴,兼容并蓄的宽广胸怀,谦和礼貌
的公德素养,奋发有为
的进取精神展现给全世界,为世界奉献一届与众不同的新奥运,为奥林
匹克运动在新世纪的发展带来新的
动力,促使这一运动真正成为跨文化、跨民族、跨国度的
世界性文化体系。
Beijing,
with more than 3000 years of history as a city, is
a model of traditional Chinese
culture. If the
Olympic is held here, the eastern and western
cultures will have a chance to integrate.
Beijing, with its new prosperous look as a
result of the country’s reform and opening-up
drive, will
present the world with a unique
Olympic so that the event can truly become a
global culture
transcending national
characteristics.
2
汉英对照, 似乎觉得译
文遗漏太多,实则是汉语思维在作怪。若按汉语的形式在译文中行
文用字,将会臃肿累赘又言之无物,译
文读者也难以获得最佳语境效果。因此,译文只能根据
原作的交际意图和译文读者的期待,用蕴涵译语文
化身份的表达方式来取代原语文化身份的
表达方式,取“义”而舍“形”,抽象概括出相关信息,按译文
惯布局, 真正实现外宣翻译的媒
介和窗口作用。
例 5
原
文:全城首家推出招牌特色“皇家第一汤”,其秉承古民间炖汤妙法,博采众长,集八
珍之奇,注山水之
泉,熔天地之精华于特制火山泥容器内,从而产生人与天地相应这天人和
一的境界。
原译:
The Hotel Royal King Soup, which is the specialty
of this hotel, is inspired by a recipe
of
ancient China. It is prepared in a special pot
with mountain spring and other rare ingredients.
“博采众长,集八珍之奇,注山水之泉,熔天地之精华于特制火山泥容器内,从而产生人
与天地
相应这天人和一的境界”是汉语广告修辞的套语,用来描述“皇家第一汤”的独特与
“无以伦比”。这种
的描述对中国受众已习以为常,但若直接转换为英语,就变成了浮夸和虚
假的言辞而不为外国读者接受。
在这种情况下,翻译的关键不是“忠实”于原文,而是抓住
原文的意图,选择主要信息以平实的语言表达
出来,反而能获得更好的效果。
改译: The Royal Family’s soup, a
delicacy prepared by the chefs in the restaurant,
is boiled in
a specially-made earthen vessel
in the traditional Chinese way.
(此例出自:朱文凤.
从目的论的视角看宾馆宣传册的汉英翻译 [D].广东外语外贸大学硕士
论文,2008:35)
二、增加
在英汉互译中,由于汉、英两种语言所承载、依附的文化之间存在巨大差异。目的语
文
本受众对通常对源语文化的了解有可能相当有限,甚至一无所知。因此,对于源语文本中的
历
史事件、地理名称、专门机构、政治术语和口号、行话和俚语、传统节日、特有的饮食文
化等等,加予注
释说明,使目的语文本的读者易于理解。例如:
例6
原文:“天府之国”的旅游业今年实现
开门红,1月份游客人数达到88万,比去年同期
增加18%。
译为:Tourism
industry in Southwest China’s Sichuan Province,
also known as the Land of
Abundance, got off
to a good start this year, with 880,000 arrivals
in January, an 18 percent increase
over the
same month last year.
这里,“天府之国”指四川,必须加予说明。同时,外
国受众没有中国方位上的认知,因
此必须指明四川在中国的哪个位置。
3
例 7
原文:由潘鹤教授设计的贺龙元
帅铜像,屹立在天子山贺龙公园。铜像高6.5米,重约
100吨。(张家界旅游画册)
译文:The Grand Bronze Statue of Marshal He Long, He
Long (1896—1969),one of the
founders of the
People’s Republic of China,born in
Sangzhi,somewhat 60 kilometers from the
tourist site, 1ed many battles during the
Chinese Civil War and Anti-Japanese War.
国内游客
大都熟悉贺龙元帅生平,原文突出雕像的雄伟气势和设计者的知名度。但境外
游客想知道的是雕像为何许
人也,为什么要树他的雕像,他与此地有何关系,而且铜像是直
观的物体,游人对它的设、计者(除非是
世界级)、高度、重量不会产生兴趣。所以作者在以
下译文中改变信息焦点,实际效果反而更好。 此外,典型的中国政治行话、具有中国国情的特有词汇如“四项基本原则”、“一个中心,
两个基本
点”、“大锅饭”、“铁饭碗”等等,如不加说明,国外受众根本就不知为何物,这就
会失去对外宣传的
目的,因此必须增加相应的文化背景解释或注释,使外国受众取得和中文
受者对原文相同或相似的宣传效
果。
例 8
原文:郑州兴亚建国饭店是北京首旅建国酒店管理有限公司管理的
五星级豪华饭店。……
拥有中西式餐厅3个,宴会包房29个,中餐厅主要经营北京官府谭家菜。
原译:Xingya Jianguo Hotel of Zhengzhou is a
Five-Star luxurious hotel administrated by
Beijing Shoulv Jianguo Hotel Administration
Co. Ltd. „„It has three Chinese and Western
restaurants, and 29 rooms for banquets. The
food served in the Chinese restaurant is the
Beijing Tan
Family Cuisine.
改译:Xingya
Jianguo Hotel of Zhengzhou, a Five-Star hotel
under Beijing Shoudu Travel
Agency Jianguo
Hotel Administration Co. Ltd., boasts of three
restaurants serving both Chinese and
western
food and banquet halls. The Chinese restaurants
mainly serve Tan family’s food, a
well-known
cuisine which was first prepared by high-ranking
officials Tan Jiajun and his son during
the
reign of Emperor Guangxu in the capital of
Beijing.
(此例出自:朱文凤. 从目的论的视角看宾馆宣传册的汉英翻译
[D].广东外语外贸大学硕士
论文,2008:32-33)
三、翻译中的重组
3.1 逻辑重组
英汉民族有着不同的文化背景、价值观念及思维方式,
因而他们的审美观和语言逻辑观
不尽相同,因此,具有特定功能的语篇构成形式也不尽相同。具体地说,
汉语语篇通常是先
把思想发散出去,再收拢回来,使得文章的段落以螺旋式发展,由远及近,常在结尾时
点题;
而英语语篇开宗明义,直点主题。翻译的过程就是译者促成跨文化交际活动的过程,在这一
4
过程中,译者起着主导作用,最终提供给译文受者的是什么样的语篇,
取决于译者对语篇内
容及其语域的把握,以及译者根据译文受者的思维和阅读习惯,对译语语篇的建构能
力(袁
晓宁,2008:104)。
例 9
原文:南京市境内,东郊有中山陵、
明孝陵、灵古寺;城南有夫子庙、中华门、雨花台;
城西有莫愁湖、朝天宫;城东有梅园新村、总统府旧
址;城北有玄武湖、鸡鸣寺,这些众多
的旅游景点,形成了以历史古迹为核心的南京独特的旅游观光圣地
。
仔细阅读原文后,我们可以发现,置于结尾的“这些众多的旅游景点,形成了以历史古迹
为
核心的南京独特的旅游观光圣地”是主题句,这是汉语语篇的构成习惯。但在英文译文中,
应该根据英文
的语篇构成习惯,将该主题句放在了语段的开头,起到开宗明义的作用,然后
再对主题句进行一一阐释,
提供背景信息。下面译文(1)的第一句就是主题句,起到总提的
作用,符合英文的表达习惯,因而层次
清楚,读上去自然流畅。
The plentiful travel destinations
in Nanjing form her unique tourist resorts
featuring cultural
relics of historic
interest. Situated on the eastern outskirts of the
city are Dr. Sun Yat-sen's
Mausoleum, Xiaoling
Mausoleum of the Ming Dynasty, and the Spirit
Valley; in the southern part
of the city lie
the Confucius Temple, Zhonghua City Gate, the Rain
Flower Terrace (Yuhutai); in
the western part
Mochou Lake, and ChaoTian Temple; in the eastern
part Meiyuan New Village,
and Presidential
Palace; in the northern part Xuanwu lake, and
Jiming Temple. (袁晓宁译)
例 10
原文:位于杭州湾北岸海盐县境内的南北湖风景区,
总面积30平方公里,由湖塘、鹰巢顶、
谭仙岭、滨海四个景区组成,融山、海、湖自然景观于一体,
兼有丰富的人文景观, 是浙江省
省级风景名胜区。
译文: Located in
Haiyan county north of the Hangzhou Bay, the
Nanbei Lake is one of the
scenic resorts in
Zhejiang province characterized by its divergent
scenic, cultural and historical
highlights.
With an area of 30 sq km, the resort comprises
four sections: The Lake Area,
Yingchaoding
(eagle-nest top), Tanxian Hill and the Seashore.
分析:原文从开始介绍南北湖的地理位置、面积、景点特征等,如枝繁叶茂的大树四处展
开,
最终收拢为“省级风景名胜区”, 体现出“先分述, 后整述的汉语段落结构”(方梦
之:2002:
73)以及信息重心后置的语言思维模式。英译文则按照英语思维的习惯,对段落结构
调整为信息重心前
置, 同时, 根据概念的认知单位切分,
主题概念为“南北湖是一个省级风
景区”,自然与人文景观是对主题概念的扩大与延伸,
以分词短语形式作为辅助成分完成一个
简单句结构;
景区面积则为另一概念单位,则由“with”短语构成另一个单句。如此一来, 译文
语义明晰紧凑,
逻辑严谨; 同时,由于译文不斤斤于字比句次, 更显流畅自如。
3.2
信息突出
5
为了有效地突出原文中某一部分信息,达到
预期效果。有时会在译文中进行重新编码和
解码,改变其原来的行文格式,以突出有效信息。这种方法尤
其常用于对外宣传报道的消息
类新闻英译中。
例 11
原文:非法闯入我军事演习
区域采访三名香港记者被遣送出境新华社福州3月10日电,
三名香港记者擅自闯入我军事演习区域进行
非法采访活动,在福建省平潭县东澳码头被当地
公安机关扣留。经审查,香港女记者孙蕴、邓德慧、刘玉
梅三人受香港东方报业集团周刊部
主管指派,于3月6日晚上飞抵福州,在3月8日凌晨潜入我军事演习
区域窃取我军事演习
情况。她们的行为违反了《中华人民共和国国家安全法》和港澳记者来内地采访的有
关规定。
福建省公安机关已在责令其书面承认错误并没收其非法获得的有关资料后,于今日下午将她们遣送出境。
分析:原文仅一段文字,中心突出,层次分明,是一则短小精炼的新闻报道。从信息
功
能来看,原文向读者表达了四层信息,但从标题上看,以第一、四句为主。翻译时应增加译
文
的逻辑性,突出有效信息。我们按事实材料的重要性依次排列,将原文信息进行重组,把
最重要的信息即
三名香港记者被遣送出境的事实及原因作为导语置于全文的第一段,尔后分
两段陈述了原文信息的第一句
和第二句,并将原文背景材料中有关的次要信息在译文中略去。
翻译如下:
Mainland
expels HK journalists
FUZHOU(Xinhua)-Three
journalists from Hong Kong were expelled from the
mainland on
Sunday afternoon by public
security officers of South China’s Fujian
Province, for violating the
State Security
Law. The journalists were detained after they were
found to be conducting illegal
interviews
inside an area where the People’s Liberation Army
was holding exercises on March 8.
They
admitted that they had flown to Fuzhou, the
provincial capital, on March 66,and got into
the exercises area early on the morning of
March 8, in order to obtain information about the
exercise.
(出自 范锋. 浅谈外宣翻译中“译前处理”的运用 [J].
重庆科技学院学报(社会科学版)
2010(6):125-127)
通过重组,译文虽改变
了原来的行文格式,但保持了原文信息的内容和功能,取得了与
原文意义相符、功能相似的效果;同时突
出了有效信息,增加了译文的逻辑性和可读性。
例 12
原文:山海关啤酒厂坐落在风景优美的避暑胜地、历史名城-山海关。素有“龙头”之称
的万里
长城的东部起端,由此伸向大海。该厂始建于1982年,后经二次扩建和技术改造,如
今已形成了具有
年产8万吨啤酒和9千吨麦芽的生产能力,是我国啤酒行业的重点骨干企业
之一。(王静, 2010)
原译:Located in Shanhaiguan, a picturesque
summer resort,and the famous historic town,
6
where the east end of the Great
Wall called “head of dragon” extends to the sea.
Shanhaiguan
Brewery was set in 1982 and has
been technically transformed twice and expanded to
the present
scale with an annual capacity of
80, 000 tons of beer and 9, 000 tons of malt. The
brewery has
become one of the key enterprises
producing beer in China.
改译:Shanhaiguan
Brewery is a key enterprise brewing beer in China.
It is located in
Shanhaiguan, a picturesque
summer resort and historical town, where the East
End of the Great
Wall extends to the sea.
Since its founding in 1982, Shanhaiguan Brewery
has been technically
transformed twice and
expanded to the present scale with an annual
capacity of 80,000 tons of beer
and 9, 000
tons of malt.
例 13
原文:xx集团位于在山
东半岛的港口城市—龙口市,这里地处环渤海经济带,东临烟台、
南靠青岛、西依龙口港、北与大连隔海
相望,地理位置优越,水、陆、空交通十分便利。南
山集团经过三十多年的艰苦创业,现已发展成为以民
营股份制经济为主体,多产业并举发展,
进入中国企业500强行列的国家级大型企业集团。
分析:这是一段介绍企业基本情况的文字,将企业的地理位置的介绍放在前面,然后是
企业的发展现状。
但把此段文字译成英语的话,需要对之进行逻辑重组,因为英语是信息功
能突出的语言,一般会直入主题
,逻辑条理清楚,而文本到最后才提到最关键的信息—中国
企业500强行列的国家级大型企业集团,所
以通过对原文进行逻辑重组后,可将其译为:
After more than twenty
years striving, xx Group has developed into a
national large
corporation group listing in
Chinese top 500 enterprises with private
shareholding economy as the
main body. It is
located in Longkou, a port city in Bohai omic Belt
in Shandong Peninsula, with
Yantai to the
east, Qingdao to the south, Longkou Port to the
west and Dalian to the north separated
by the
sea, which provides superior geographic advantages
and convenient transportation in the
water,
land and air to the company.
译文通过调整逻辑结构,将重点信息置
于句首,这样就突出了文本的信息功能,符合英文
思维结构,使文本更好地发挥出呼唤功能和信息功能,
以达到宣传的作用。
例 14
原文:钦州学院位于风景秀美的滨海城市——钦州
,广西北部湾经济区核心工业区。钦
州学院于1973年建校,是广西沿海地区唯一一所公立普通本科高
等院校。我院分为校本部、
东校区两个校区。校园内有现代化的教学大楼,环境优美,绿树成荫,是一个
充满生机与活
力,适宜学习和生活的地方。
原译:Qinzhou University
is situated in Qinzhou, which is a beautiful
coastal city and the core
industrial area of
Beibu Gulf Economic Zone of Guangxi. Founded in
1973, the university is the
only state-run
university along the coast of Guangxi. Currently
there are two campuses in the
7
university. With modern teaching
buildings, beautiful flowers and evergreen trees
and grass, the
university offers students a
good, lively learning atmosphere and a comfortable
living
environment.
道理同上。此译文出自钦州学院国外留学生招生
手册,其中“广西北部湾经济区核心工
业区”的英译文足以让很多欲来钦州学院学习的外国人望而却步。
中国很多地方常以此来暗
示“发展潜力大”和“发达地区”,“核心工业区”也就意味着污染严重。因此
翻译应省去
这一信息。此外,大学通常与研究、学习相关联,怎会是适宜学习和生活的地方?
改译:Qinzhou University, established in 1973, is
so far the only public university of Guangxi
Coastal Area. Located in Qinzhou, a beautiful
coastal city, the university consists of two
campuses:
the Main Campus and the East Campus.
These two campuses, with avenues of green trees
and
patches of lush grass, are ideal places
for study and research. (司继涛 改译)
3.3
信息搭配调整
例 15
原文:该大楼是集科研、实验和教学功能为一体的组合楼群
,包括主楼、东楼、南楼和
西楼。其中,主楼、南楼为北部湾海洋人才培训中心约26436㎡,占总面
积的80%;西楼为
教室约3500㎡、东楼约2843㎡。主楼规划为海洋信息处理中心、海洋可持续
发展管理研究、
海洋与海岸带防灾减灾研究、海洋生态研究室、海洋资源保护和利用研究室、船舶污染控
制
技术和清洁能源开发利用实验室、沿海绿色生产培训中心、大学物理实验室;南楼规划为海
洋
环保生化实验楼,包括化学实验室、生物实验室、海产品加工研究室、海水养殖研究室;
东楼包含学术报
告中心及媒体传播与制作室;西楼为培训用的教室。
The complex, composed
of the Main Building, the South Building, the East
Building and the
West Building , integrates
teaching, experiment and research into an organic
whole.
The Main building and the South
Building constitute Beibu Gulf Talent Training
Center, which
takes up about 26, 436
m
2
(80% of the total building area). The
Main Building consists of
Information & Data
Proceeding Centre, Marine Sustainable Management
Centre, Seas and
Seacoasts Disaster Combating
and Prevention Institute, Marine Ecology Research
Laboratory,
Marine Resource Cultivation and
Utilization Research Laboratory, Shipping
Pollution Control and
Clean Energy Research
Laboratory, Coastal Green Production Training
Center, University Physics
Laboratory. The
South Building, designed to be Marine
Environmental Protection & Biochemical
Laboratory Building, is composed of Chemistry
Laboratory, Biological Laboratory, Marine
products processing Research Laboratory and
Marine Aquaculture Laboratory.
The East
Building, composed of Academic Report Centre and
Media Communication and
Production Room, takes
up about 2,843m
2
. And the West Building,
designed to be classroom
building, covers
about 3,500 m
2
.
8
例 16
原文:上海银舟大厦位于上海浦东陆家嘴经贸区,东临主干
线源深路,西濒临该地区的集
中绿地双子广场,占地5037m2,楼面面积37700平方米,
高100米, 28层,为商贸结合的高
级办公楼。
Located in the
center of Pudong’s Lujiazui financial zone, the
100-meter-high Shanghai Silver
Boat Mansion is
a 28-storey deluxe commercial and office building,
standing on a site of 5,037
square meters with
a GFA of 37, 700 square meters. It faces on the
east the Yuanshen Road, one of
the city’s main
roads, and the Shangzi Square green zone on the
west.
4. 改写
由于汉英两种语言所属的文化不同,它们各有一套被各自
读者所理解,在特定语境中只
具备语用意义的习惯表达。这些习、惯表达的语用意义对其读者常常是约定
俗成,心照不宣
的。在翻译中,译者必须认真识别它们的语用意义,避免字面翻译,以免影响译文的预期
目
的。如:
例 17
原文:
尊敬的领导,各位来宾:
在党的正确领导下,在xx精神的鼓舞下,在xx会议的推动下,在xx方针的指导下,在党委<
br>的亲切关怀和具体指导下,在兄弟单位的支持下,我们这个讲习班开学了。
(选自居祖纯《汉英翻译强化训练》)
Respected Leaders,
Distinguished Guests,
Ladies and
Gentlemen,
I have the honor to declare the
seminar open. I'd like, if I may,to take this
opportunity to
convey our gratitude to those
whose support and assistance have made the seminar
possible. Our
particular thanks should go
to..........
例 18
原文:中国广西, 一大片古老深远,壮美的国土。十万大山峰峦叠嶂,古木参天,
流水潺
潺。十万大山, 一个响亮的名字;
十万大山系列食品是广西山水哺育出来的品牌;“十万大山”
是广西农垦人的共同名字。
原译: In Guangxi, China, there is a large,
magnificent, profound, ancient land. Inside the
range
of Great Mountain (Shiwandashan), peaks
overlap peaks, old trees reach into the sky, and
creeks
murmur. Great mountain, a resounding
name, is a brand name nurtured by the mountains
and rivers
of Guangxi; Great Mountain has
become the common name of Guangxi State Farms
Group.
改译:Great Mountain, a brand dealing
with farming products of Shiwandashan in Guangxi,
9
China, is a famous brand of
Guangxi State Farms Group Co. ltd.
例 19
原文:诞生于上世纪末的虎豹集团信守孜孜以求、永不言退的发展理念,在
市场经济的大
潮中,任凭浊浪排空,惊涛拍岸,独有胜似闲庭信步的自信,处变不惊,运筹帷幄。尽握无
限
商机于掌间, 渐显王者之气于天地……
虎豹人以其特有的灵气,极目一流,精益求精,集
世界顶尖服装生产技术装备之大成。裁
天上彩虹,绣人间缤纷,开设计之先河,臻质量之高峰,领导服装
潮流,尽显领袖风采……
天道酬勤,不断进取的虎豹人撷取了一个又一个辉煌。
Founded in the late 1980s, the Hubao Group is
determined to succeed...
The Hubao Group has
a high standard of quality and is well-equipped
with the world’s most
advanced technology.
They are taking the lead in designing new fashions
and maintaining high
quality products...The
Hubao Group has made one achievement after another
due to their diligence.
例 20
原文:“三金”牌商标被国家工商行政管理局认定为“中国驰名商标”,“三金”牌产品
已行销
海内外, 并享有良好声誉。企业还荣获全国企业管理杰出贡献奖、全国“五一”劳动
奖状、全国思想政
治工作优秀企业、全国文明单位、全国中药行业优秀企业等荣誉。
分析:中文企业简介常常罗列奖项或
称号以展示企业信誉度和知名度,这些奖项大多数是
由国家或省市政府颁发的,在我国消费者心目中有很
高的认可度,也体现着企业的声誉和实
力。而在西方, 很少存在国家性质的向企业颁发的奖项, 企业
的实力也大多通过年度营业额
和员工人数等数据来直接体现。所以,中文简介中的这些奖项即使译出,也
会让外商“不知所
云”。所以在翻译时,同类的奖项大多数可以省去不译, 可以用概括的形式
(如译为“have been
granted many honorable
titles”,或“have been sold well”等)一笔代过。当然,不是所有的奖
项或称号都可以省去不译,以下两种奖项属于有价值信息, 应准确地译出:
①具有一定国际
知名度的,关系企业销量的奖项,
如例文的“中国驰名商标”等。②关系到外商在华利益的,
如
“中华人民共和国海关保税工厂(bonded factory)”等。
译文:Sanjin Brand”has been determined as“The
Chinese Famous Brand”. Enjoying good
reputation both in China and abroad, the
products of“Sanjin Brand”have been sold well all
over
China and exported to Southeast Asia, the
US, Canada, Australia etc.
例 21
原文:“不到万里长城非好汉, 不吃全聚德烤鸭真遗憾!”在百余年里,全聚德菜品经过不
断创新发展
,形成了以独具特色的全聚德烤鸭为龙头, 集“全鸭席”和400多道特色菜品于一
体的全聚德菜系,
备受各国元首、政府官员、社会各界人士及国内外游客喜爱,
被誉为“中
华第一吃”。敬爱的周恩来总理曾多次把全聚德“全鸭席”选为国宴。
10
分析:译文的目的(功能):宣传全聚德的菜;
译文读者:懂英语的外国人;
源文功能:
感染型文本,以国内游客导向;翻译问题:1“不到万里长城非好汉,
不吃全聚德烤鸭真遗憾!”
(是否需要译出?)2.
敬爱的周恩来总理曾多次把全聚德“全鸭席”选为国宴。(译出来,
外国游客是否理解,是否突出主题)
译文: The well-known All-Duck Banquet is headed
by QUANJUDE roast duck and supported
by
over400 dishes with QUANJUDE characteristic
flavor. Government leaders, officials and VIPs
from nearly 200 countries and regions have
visited QUANJUDE roast duck restaurants and had
dinner here.
例 22
原文:钦州坭兴陶,古称越陶,
据考证产生于隋唐,距今已有1300多年的历史。陶器采
用钦江东西两岸特有的红陶土按一定比例配置
,泥质纯净细腻,适合刻字和表现传统浮雕工
艺。经过高温烧制后,形成“窑变”而成古铜色、深蓝色、
墨绿色、朱红色等诸多颜色,再
经过抛光处理,成品光润柔和,晶莹似玉,古香古色,享有“中国一绝”
之美誉。1915年钦
州坭兴陶在巴拿马国际博览会上获得金奖,与宜兴紫砂陶、四川荣昌陶和云南建水
陶并称“中
国四大名陶”。
原译:Nixing pottery of Qinzhou,
once original named Yue pottery. There is
convincing
evidence it invented 1300 years ago
between Sui and Tang Dynasties. The pottery is
made from
proper clay of the east and west
coast of Qin River in Qinzhou of Guangxi Province.
The clay of
Nixing pottery is the most
suitable material for carving and relief for its
high quality. Firing with the
high
temperature, the pottery forms a colourful beauty.
The end products are character by glittering
and quaint, it is a treasure of China. The
said pottery won the Gold Awards in Panama &
Pacific
International Exhibition in 1915. It
is well-known as one of “the four famous
potteries”of China.
分析:原译错误多多,且不说有多处的语法、用词上的错
误,仅从语篇结构和信息传递
来看,原译基本是按原文结构“亦步亦趋”,基本上把按原文全译,仅在最
后没有译出“宜兴....”,
“秉承”了原文的特点,将“据考证....已有....历史”“光润
柔和,晶莹似玉,古香古色,享有
“中国一绝”之美誉”等套语完全译出,给人感觉过度夸张,有虚假宣
传之嫌,而且费了不
少笔墨来翻译“窑变”这一制作过程,这一专业术语对国内读者而言尚难懂,更何况
外国游
客?译出不仅占据过多篇幅,对原文主题的突出也帮助不大,而且也未必为外国读者理解。
文中“钦江东西两岸”是否要译出“东西”?江河只有两岸,有“东西两岸”,也就意味着也
有“南北
两岸”,钦江岂不是湖?此外,“坭兴陶获得....金奖”指的是它的某一或几件作品产
品而非所有产
品的总和都获得金奖;至于“宜兴紫砂陶...”等译出来反而有转移读者视线,
为别人作免费广告的可
能,也可省去,而转为“中国最好的陶器之一”的表达更有效果。
With a history
of more than 1, 300 years, Qinzhou Nixing Pottery
(known as Yue Pottery in
ancient times) has
been referred to as one of the finest Chinese
pottery. It is noted for its
transmutation
glaze wares which feature in a natural antique
style with metallic colors blended. In
11
1915, one piece of its wares was
awarded a gold medal in the Panama-Pacific
International
Exhibition, and since then
Qinzhou Nixing Pottery became world-famous. (司继涛
译)
例 23
刘永福故居
原文:
民族英雄刘永福
的故居是三宣堂,刘永福在越南抗法战争中屡建战功,被越南王封为三
宣提督而得名。它建于光绪十七年
(公元1891年),占地面积22776平方米。大门朝东,门
楣有“三宣堂”三字,左右为“枝栖古
越,派衍彭城“,有大小厅房119间,用料考究,造
型端庄而朴实,规模宏大,布局独特。屋内雕梁画
栋交相辉映,既有晚清风格,又有民族特
色。是一处气势不凡、宏伟富丽、典雅古朴的建筑。三宣堂大门
朝东,门楣有“三宣堂”三
字,左右为“派衍彭城,枝栖古越”的对联,”的对联,字迹苍劲俊逸。刘永
福在中法战争中,
率黑旗军抗击法国侵略者,先后取得罗池大捷、纸桥大捷等,是著名的爱国将士。三宣
堂浓
缩了民族英雄刘永福一生爱国爱民的光辉业绩,吸引了国内外众多的仰慕者瞻仰。三宣堂不
仅是国家爱国主义教育基地和国家重点文物保护单位,还具有很高的艺术价值。
调整原文信息思路:
三宣堂——民族英雄刘永福的故居,因刘永福在越南抗法战争中屡建战功
,被越南王封
为三宣提督而得名。建于光绪十七年(公元1891年),占地面积22776平方米,三
宣堂大门朝
东,门楣有“三宣堂”三字,左右为“派衍彭城,枝栖古越”的对联,字迹苍劲俊逸。屋内有
大小厅房119间,用料考究,造型端庄而朴实,规模宏大,布局独特。雕梁画栋交相辉映,
既
有晚清风格,又有民族特色。是一处气势不凡、宏伟富丽、典雅古朴的建筑。
三宣堂浓缩了民族英雄刘
永福一生爱国爱民的光辉业绩,在清末中法战争中,刘永福率
黑旗军抗击法国侵略者,先后取得罗池大捷
、纸桥大捷等。三宣堂作为国家爱国主义教育基
地和国家重点文物保护单位,吸引了国内外众多的仰慕者
瞻仰
。
分析:尽管将原作逻辑理顺了,但是刘永福故居的翻译还要再做进一步调整处理。这是
因为对中国人来说“刘永福”是民族英雄,但对外国人,刘永福何许人?因此,首先说明刘
永福
故居在钦州有何地位,以吸引读者的注意力。然后再介绍刘永福,最后才到故居本身的
名字、故居由外到
内的描述。逐步推动国外游客的游兴。刘永福故居是爱国主义教育基地,
对中国人来说极有教育意义的;
对国外游客而言,就没有这种意义。因此,译文应淡化这方
面的色彩,原文中“...大捷”对国外游客
是毫无意义的,也没有必要翻译出来。经过这样分
析,试译如下:
Sanxuan
Hall, the Former Residence of Liu yong-fu, is a
famous Qinzhou landmark.
Liu yong-fu
(1837-1917) was a great Chinese hero of late Qing
Dynasty. Throughout his life,
he devoted to
fight against foreign aggression.
The
Residence witnessed his glorious life and
12
achievements in the wars against
the French invaders.
Built in 1891, Sanxuan
Hall was named after Liu yong-fu’s official
title—Military
Commander of Sanxuan province,
which was dubbed by Side Emperor of Vietnam
(1829-1883) for
his exploits in wars against
the French invaders in Vietnam. With an area of
about 23 hectares, the
Residence is a large-
scale traditional Chinese architectural complex in
the style of the late Qing
Dynasty. Its gate
faces east, the lintel engraved with 3 Chinese
Characters San Xuan Tang (Sanxuan
Hall),
either side of the gate with a Chinese
antithetical couplet which read the right side to
the left
Pai Yan PengCheng, Zhi Qi Gu Yue
(originated from Liu Family of Pengcheng—today's
Xuzhou in
Jiangsu province, and settled in
Yuezhou—today's Qinzhou). Inside there’re 119
rooms of different
sizes, which were built
with selected materials and well laid out. The
painted ridges and carved
beams all contribute
to the sumptuous effect.
(司继涛 译)
例
24
英语教育专业培养具有较扎实的英语语言基础和宽广文化知识,能运用
英语在教育、文
化、科研、经贸、外事、旅游等部门从事教学、翻译、管理、研究等工作的专门人才。同
时
具有较强的获取知识、运用知识、分析问题及创新的能力。
1.
本专业培养从事教学、翻译、管理、研究等工作的专门人才
2.
具有较强的获取知识、运用知识、分析问题及创新的能力
3.
具有较扎实的英语语言基础和宽广文化知识,
4.
运用英语在教育、文化、科研、经贸、外事、旅游等部门
The program of
English Education aims at training professionals
engaged in language teaching
& research,
translation, management. With a pioneering spirit
as well as problem-analysing and
decision-
making capacities, they are adept in theory and
practice of English linguistics, are capable
of applying English into the fields of
education, scientific research, trade, foreign
affairs and
tourism.
(司继涛 译)
例
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原文:随着我国汽车工业的飞速发展,汽车家庭化、大众化已成事实,人车一体化的生活<
br>逐渐成为时尚,爱车养车理念已渐入人心。所以,汽车美容养护势如破竹,前景一片光明。
(贾文
波,2006)
With the rapid development of domestic
auto industry in China, it’s become a fashion for
people to enjoy a life with their own cars,
which, therefore, brings about a good opportunity
to
develop the auto beauty and maintenance
service.
例 26
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原
文:根据国务院《电力体制改革方案》,中国南方电网有限责任公司于2002年12月29
日正式挂牌
成立并开始运作。公司经营范围为广东、广西、云南、贵州和海南五省(区),负
责投资、建设和经营管
理南方区域电网,经营相关的输配电业务,参与投资、建设和经营相
关的跨区域输变电和联网工程;从事
电力购销业务,负责电力交易与调度;从事国内外投融
资业务;自主开展外贸流通经营、国际合作、对外
工程承包和对外劳务合作等业务。
公司辖属的南方电网覆盖五省(区),面积约100万平方公里,东
西跨度近2000公里,
供电总人口2.3亿人。网内拥有水、煤、核、抽水蓄能、油、气、风力等多种
电源,网内总
装机容量超过1亿千瓦。目前西电东送已经形成“3条直流、6条交流”9条西电东送大通
道,
最大输电能力超过1200万千瓦。
China Southern Power
Grid Co., Ltd. (hereinafterreferred to as CSG) was
established on
December 29th, 2002 as a result
of one of the power sector deregulatory reforms in
China. As one
of two state-owned power grid
companies in China, CSG invests, constructs and
operates the power
networks in Guangdong,
Guangxi, Yunnan, Guizhou and Hainan provinces and
regions where 230
million people, living on 1
million square kilometers of land, benefit from
its power supply
services.
是一篇较为详细的公司介绍,包
括公司的成立、经营范围、分公司的分布以及电网覆盖
面。译文采用编译的变译策略,仅用一段文字概括
了原文的核心内容,言简意赅,条理清楚,
使外国的潜在消费者很容易涉猎到主要内容,避免了在冗繁的
文字中寻找有用信息。
例 27
创建于1986年的福州船政学堂,是中国最早
的科技专科学校。学堂海纳百川,领风气之
先,开中国新式教育之先河,既引进国外先进科技、人才及办
学模式,中西合璧,培养新人;
又选派优秀学生出洋留学深造。
译文:Founded in
1866, Fujian Marine Art College was the first
polytechnic school in China.
Leading in the
country, the college was a pioneer of modern
schools where advanced technologies
and new
ways of school running from the West were
introduced to meet with the best in the Chinese
educational system. It was also where many
talented people were selected to study aboard.
(出自:陈小慰.新编实用翻译教程[M].北京:经济科学出版社, 2006:87)
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