FML段子集合
盘锦事业单位招聘-婚纱活动
FML段子集合
，然后在中国各大社区也开始风靡了。
根据其缩写FML，在国内的一些网友也将其称为 发霉啦 。
FML段子集合：
Today, I got stitches
in my breast. I never knew how much
they
jiggled until every bump on the road made my
breast feel
like it was on fire. FML
Today, coming home, I opened up my door to
find my
drunk boyfriend trying to teach our
three baby parakeets to
perch on his erect
penis. FML
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Today,
I was leading a tour of my university and saw a
girl
in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking
a cigarette. I told
her that she shouldn't be
representing the school in such a
manner. She
shot back: I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my
dick,
bitch. FML
Today, I woke
up to my roommate trying to put a burrito
and
a pack of mild sauce in between my 's only lived
here for two weeks, and this is the second
time I've woken up
to him doing something like
this. FML
Today, while having sex
with my boyfriend, I discovered
that I climax
sooner if I think about pretzels. Yes, pretzels.
The
food product. I'll never be able to eat
them again. FML
Today, my brother
and I were talking about Ebola, when
he says
he would love to have the disease because of how
famous it would make him. Plus, his college
essays about him
fighting through the disease
would be phenomenal . FML
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Today, my brother and I were talking
about Ebola, when
he says he would love to
have the disease because of how
famous it
would make him. Plus, his college essays about him
fighting through the disease would be
phenomenal . FML
Today, my
boyfriend told me that he'd feel like a failure if
he went to community college. I'm planning to
go to
community college next year. FML
Today, before work, I was quickly
cleaning when I tripped
and the side of my
neck hit the countertop, causing a dark
bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop
giving me high
fives for getting laid and I
was too embarrassed to tell them
truth that
I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML
Today, my sister had an accident at a stoplight
because
she was uploading pictures of herself
driving onto Instagram.
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Not
long after that, she posted a picture of the crash
and
commented, My first crash lol. FML
Today, I watched from my office window
as a couple
maneuvered their car to squash a
dead pigeon flat on the road.
I then watched
as they got out of the car, set up tripods and
started taking photos of it. FML
Today, an elderly woman was crossing the
street and
dropped her bag of groceries. I got
out of my car to assist her,
but she beat me
repeatedly, yelling that I was enforcing a
stereotype . Sorry for trying to help. FML
Today, I left for a fifteen-hour
drive with two guys who
won't stop talking in
a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am.
FML
Today, I got called to the guidance
office, only to be told
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my
boyfriend broke up with me. He wasn't sure how to
break
the news to me, so he made my guidance
counselor do it for
him. FML
Today, my friends and I went paintballing.
The instructor
showed us the sound of an
unloaded gun by shooting at my
face. It wasn't
unloaded. FML
Today, my boyfriend
decided he's asexual and dumped
me on the
spot. FML
Today, my wife pressed a
button in the elevator and
quickly ran out,
leaving me in there with my crying baby. When
the elevator arrived at the floor, the doors
opened on a
wedding reception. The doors
couldn't have taken any longer
to close again
FML
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Today, it's
my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the
perfect card and of course the perfect , it
was the
perfect cake until my dog's ass
crushed it. FML
Today, it's the
first birthday of the condom in my pocket.
FML
Today, I was having sex with my
boyfriend in the
missionary position. Once
again, our cat decided to crawl onto
his back
and stare at me. FML
Today, I got
back from a weekend at my best friend's
house.
Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game.
It
involves sticking duct tape to their pubic
hairs, ripping them
out, and sticking as many
as possible on my face and body
before I wake
up. FML
Today, I was boxing up all
my brother's old stuff to take
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to the attic. I came across a box, and
without checking what
was inside, I took it
up, just to have it fall on my head, to then
find out it was filled with dead baby
hamsters. FML
Today, my son drank a
bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a
dare, he
actually thought that it would give him a fever so
that
he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot
is 15 years old. FML
Today, I
received an email from an angry parent,
demanding that I give his daughter an A on a
project which I
had given her a 0 on. The
project was to pick an article related
to
science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a
hoax article
relating to Ebola patients rising
from the dead. FML
Today, my
morning sickness got so bad that, while at the
grocery store, I had to throw up in my purse.
FML
*类似网站：
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发霉啦：(fameila)
FML即FuckMyLife，我们将其本土化翻译
为发霉啦。
在
生活中遇到的不可思议或者相当无奈的事情，怎么办，来发
霉啦晒一下，让霉事晒太阳，为自己求人品。
实话实说FML!(SHSS)：发贴审理比较严格，适合积极向上的
80及90后青年.另外还有手机WAP网站,相当方便 宣传口号是
与
地球人分享你生活中各种哭笑不得的倒霉事, 发霉事. Everything
sucks!...FML!
FML中文网(fml001)：国内
创建最早的山寨网站，也是目前用
户最多，更新最稳定的站点。内容包含转贴翻译和原创两部分，FML
er
的口号是：用扯淡的勇气，直面艹蛋的人生。
小事一箩筐(xiaoshiyiluokuang)：以记录生活中的琐事为主，
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讲究细腻的文风。
FML中文自助互助学习社区：以学英文为主，全部翻译fmylife
的内容
天雷啊(tleia)：国内山寨网站之一，以TLA代替FML
TMD(tmd001)：同上，以TMD代替FML，以上两个网站与
原版网站版式基本一致
FML中文网之二(fmylife001)：国内山寨网站之一，内容主要<
br>包含英文FML的翻译，翻译质量和速度都比较高。
糗事百科- 36
5天内最最尴尬的糗事:国内最早的此类网站,建于
2005，要比fmylife(2008建站)要
早不少。
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草蛋网(caoegg)
- 分享你草蛋的事!：国内的又一山寨fmylife,
拥有不少糗事，草蛋的事在上面!
KaoMyLife-身边糗事:分享生活中的糗事。
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