地下城女鬼剑-苏格拉底的申辩

Where is the egg?
Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word
Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.
Teacher:Then where is the “egg
Student:In the cake,Sir.
鸡蛋在哪里？
老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？
学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。
老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？
学生：在蛋糕里，先生

Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, ？




？



他的耳朵在我衣兜里

伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事？”

“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”

Virtue

Many years after receiving my graduate degree, I returned to the State
University of New York at Binghamton as a faculty member. One day in a
crowded elevator, someone remarked on its inefficiency. I said the
elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.

When the door finally opened, I felt a compassionate pat on my back, and
turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. get that degree, dear,
she whispered.

美 德

获取研究生学位多年以后，我回到位于宾翰顿 的纽约州立大学当教员。一天，电
梯里很拥挤，有人抱怨电梯效率太低。我说自我在那里当学生起，20 年来电梯
一直没有换过。

最后当电梯门打开时，我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍 了一下，回过头来我看到
一位年长的修女正在朝我微笑。“你会拿到学位的，亲爱的，”她低声说道：“ 坚
持不懈是一种美德。”

Difference

can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class,observed
the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California
State University in Los Angeles.
undergraduates respond, 'Good the graduate students just
write it down.
区 别


“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我
们研究生上工程 学课的老师如此说。“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午
好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本 上。”

Flunking Math

My son, who made the dean's list in his freshman year at Ball State
University in Muncie, Ind., called home a few weeks after starting his
sophomore year as a psychology student.


It isn't the grades that are so important, but the quality of what is
learned and how it is applied to daily life. I'm lucky to be having these
wonderful experiences!





数学没及格


我儿子是印第安那市曼西尔波州立大学的学生，大学一年 级就上了系主任的名
单。第二年他学心理学，刚几个星期他就给家里打了个电话。

“妈妈，”他激动地说：“我找到了如何在大学里生存下去的答案!重要的不是
分数， 而是具备将学到的知识应用于日常生活的素质。我很幸运地有了这种奇妙
的经历。”

“你到底是什么意思？”我问道。

“我数学没及格。”他回答说。

Part-time Job

When my son was a hign-school sophomore, he got a part-time job sacking
groceries at a supermarket. He came home all smiles.




girls.

Since Stephen is not very talkative, I asked, did you say to them?



业余工作


我儿子在一所中学读二年级时，在一家超级市场找到了一份包装商品的业余工
作。他 满面笑容地回到了家。

“第一天感觉如何？”我问。

“好极了，爸爸。”他答道，“我跟许多漂亮的女孩子讲了话。”

由于斯蒂芬不善言谈，我问道：“你跟他们说了些什么？”

“你是喜欢纸包装还是塑料包装？”

Keys? Kiss?

A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adult who had
recently come to live in the United States. After placing quite a number
of everyday objects on a table, he asked various members of the class to
give him the ruler, the book, the pen and so on. The class went very
smoothly and the students seemed interested and serious about the work
that they were engaged in until when my friend turned to an Italian student

and said,
a loss. Seeing this, my friend thought that the student hadn't heard him
clearly, so he repeated.
shoulders. Then, he threw his arms around the teacher's neck and kissed
him on both cheeks.

钥匙还是接吻


我的一位朋 友在给一个成人学生班级上英语课。他们都是新近来美国生活的。在
一张桌子上摆了许多日常用品之后， 他请全班同学给他挑出尺子，书本，钢笔等。
课进行得井然有序，学生们对自己所做的似乎很感兴趣，也 很认真。后来轮到一
名来自意大利的学生，我的朋友说：“给我钥匙。”那人看起来非常吃惊，也有点手足无措。看到这种情况，我的朋友想是他没有听清楚，于是又重复了一遍：
“给我钥匙。”那位 意大利学生耸了耸肩。接着，他伸出胳膊搂住老师的脖子在
双颊上亲了两下。

Prepare Yourself

A story around campus has it taht a student once sent a telegram to his
parents reading: - flunked all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare
Pop.

Two days later he received a response: prepared. Prepare yourself.

自己做好准备


校园 里流传着这样的故事：一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报，上面写着：“妈
妈－我所有功课都不及格，被 学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”

两天以后，他收到了回电：“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!”