经典幽默英语故事(30个) (1)
玛丽莲梦兔
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2021年01月17日 11:09
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合工大分数线-青春校园电影
经典幽默英语故事（
50
个）
要求：
1
、每天阅读两篇小故事，写出故事大意，尽量理解故事里的幽默点。
2< br>、在阅读故事的过程中，遇到不认识的单词，先不要查字典。
阅读
完小故事后，可以查一 查文章里的词汇，并做一些笔记。
3
、开学后，请把这
14
页的阅 读素材，装订成册，上交给各班的英语
老师。老师会根据你的完成情况，给你的阅读作业打出分数。
姓名：
_________
班级：
_________
学号：
_________
成绩：
_________
第一篇
My First and My Last
When George was thirty-five, he bought a small plane and learned to
fly it. He soon became very good and made his plane do all kinds of
tricks.
George had a friend. His name was Mark. One day George offered to take
Mark up in his plane. Mark thought,
several times, but I've never been in a small one, so I'll go.
They went up, and George flew around for half an hour and did all
kinds of tricks in the air.
When they came down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely, and
he said to his friend in a shaking voice,
very much for those two trips in your plane.
Gerogy was very surprised and said,
故事大意：
_____________ __________________________________________________ ________________
______________________________ _________________________________________________< br>_______________________________________________ ________________________________
______________ __________________________________________________ _______________
第二篇
First Flight
Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents,
so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was
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very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe,
and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.
His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had
heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was
extremely frightened and closed his eyes.
After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to
his friend,
故事大意：________________________________________________ _______________________________
_______________ __________________________________________________ ______________
________________________________ _______________________________________________
_________________________________________________ ______________________________
第三篇
A Nail Or A Fly?
An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in
each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on,
the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor. When a waitress discovered what had
happened, she showed deep sympathy for him and decided to do him a favour.
So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail
exactly where the fly had stayed.
Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident.
When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adn
slapped it with all his strength. On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her
great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand
bleeding! < br>故事大意：
______________________________________ _________________________________________
_____ __________________________________________________ ________________________
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___________ __________________________________________________ __________________
____________________________ __________________________________________________ _
第四篇
I'll
See
to
the
Rest
A
guard
was
about
to
signal
his
train
to
start
when
he
saw
an
attractive
girl
standing
on
the
platform
by
an
open
door,
talking
to
another
pretty
girl
inside
the
carriage.
on,
miss!
he
shouted.
the
door,
please!
I
just
want
to
kiss
my
sister
goodbye,
she
called
back.
just
shut
that
door,
please,
called
the
guard,
I'll
see
to
the
rest.
故事大意：
_______________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________
_______________ __________________________________________________ ______________
________________________________ _______________________________________________
第五篇
Chaude and Cold
A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded.
he complained.
< br>Montreal.
故事大意：
_________________ __________________________________________________ ____________
__________________________________ _____________________________________________
_ __________________________________________________ ____________________________
__________________ __________________________________________________ ___________
第六篇
A Soldier's Brilliant Idea
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Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by
air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he
looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There
was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not
taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.
When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said,
unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something
particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit
in.
Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice
and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The
soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside
himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.
故事大意：
______________________________ _________________________________________________< br>_______________________________________________ ________________________________
______________ __________________________________________________ _______________
_______________________________ ________________________________________________
第七篇
New Discovery
A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy
older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door
slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.
Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled,
故事大意：
__________________ __________________________________________________ ___________
___________________________________ ____________________________________________
__ __________________________________________________ ___________________________
4
________ __________________________________________________ _____________________
第八篇
A Bad Impression
Six people were travelling in a compartment on a train. Five of them were quiet and well behaved,
but the sixth was a rude young man who was causing a lot of trouble to the other passengers.
At last this young man got out at a station with his two heavy bags. None of the other passengers
helped him, but one of them waited until the rude young man was very far away and then opened
the window and shouted to him,
the window again.
The young man truned around and hurried back with his two bags. He was very
tired when he
arrived, but he shouted through the window,
As the train began to move again, the passenger who had called him back opened the window and
said,
故事大意 ：
_____________________________________________ __________________________________
____________ __________________________________________________ _________________
_____________________________ __________________________________________________
______________________________________________ _________________________________
第九篇
Sleeping
Pills
Bob
was
having
trouble
getting
to
sleep
at
night.
He
went
to
see
his
doctor,
who
prescrib
ed
some
extra-strong
sleeping
pills.
Sunday
night
Bob
took
the
pills,
slept
well
and
was
awake
before
he
heard
the
alarm.
He
took
his
time
getting
to
the
office,
strolled
in
and
said
to
his
boss:
didn't
have
a
bit
of
trouble
getting
up
this
morning.
fine,
roared
the
boss,
where
were
you
Monday
and
Tuesday?
故事大意：
______ __________________________________________________ _______________________
_______________________ __________________________________________________ ______
________________________________________ _______________________________________
_______ __________________________________________________ ______________________
第十篇
Creative
5
Applying for my first job, I realized I had to be creative in listing my few qualifications. Asked
about
additional
schooling
and
training,
I
answered
truthfully
that
I
had
spent
three
years
in
computer programming classes. I got the job.
I had neglected to mention that I took the same course for three years before I passed.
故事大意：
_________________________________________ ______________________________________
________ __________________________________________________ _____________________
_________________________ __________________________________________________ ____
__________________________________________ _____________________________________
第
11
篇
Reminder
In
the
veterinary
office
where
I'm
a
technician,
we
out
reminders
when
pets
are
due
for
vaccinations.
Bruno,
a
German
shepherd,
arrived
for
his
annual
rabies
shot,
and
we
were
required
by
state
law
to
ask
his
owner
if
Bruno
had
bitten
anyone
in
the
last
ten
d
ays.
yes,
in
fact
that's
why
we're
here,
she
replied.
Surprised,
I
told
her
we
assume
d
they'd
come
in
because
of
our
reminder.
did,
she
explained.
bit
the
carrier
who
was
delivering
your
card.
故事大意：
____ __________________________________________________ _________________________
_____________________ __________________________________________________ ________
______________________________________ _________________________________________
_____ __________________________________________________ ________________________
第
12
篇
Imitate Birds
A man tried to get a job in a stage show.
故事大意：
_______________________________________ ________________________________________
______ __________________________________________________ _______________________
_______________________ __________________________________________________ ______
________________________________________ _______________________________________
6
第
13
篇
How Did You Ever Get Here
One winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late.
was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two.
The boss eyed him suspiciously.
故事大意：
_______________ __________________________________________________ ______________
________________________________ _______________________________________________
_________________________________________________ ______________________________
________________ __________________________________________________ _____________
第
14
篇
Three Surgeons
Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills.
off,
on, and today that man is a marathon runner.
was nothing left but a horse's posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United
States Senate.
故事大意：
________________________________________ _______________________________________
_______ __________________________________________________ ______________________
________________________ __________________________________________________ _____
_________________________________________ ______________________________________
第
15
篇
One Side of the Case
A
judge
asked
our
group
of
potential
jurors
whether
anyone
should
be
excused,
and
one
man
raised his hand.
at a time.
故事大意：
________________________________ _______________________________________________
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